HEY I'M DOING AN ESSAY ON TRANS PEOPLE IN HISTORY ARE THERE ANY PEOPLE I SHOULD INCLUDE I already have people like Marsha P. Johnson, Catherine Jorgensen, and Sammy Williams, but I'd love any people that made some significant impacts; bonus points if its further back in history :))
I (20 F) am currently courting someone (20 NB) and they are just the coolest person. For sake of privacy, we'll name them Kitty. We've been flirting and have said to each other that we do, in fact, like each other, and everything seems to be going really really well!
Unfortunately, I am a new lesbian, and still working out some deeply rooted religious stuff (I grew up in a Catholic, homophobic family so I don't think I'll ever be able to introduce Kitty even if we do end up dating). I just broke up recently with my ex-boyfriend (20 M) of one year because I have realized my sexuality (and some boundary stuff but I won't get into that), but I really am torn between healing myself on my own and figuring myself out as I court Kitty. They are so so cool and very very understanding, and I don't wanna drag them into something that they didn't ask to be a part of, but maybe if I explain everything, then maybe it'll be okay? I haven't brought any of this up with them, I feel as if it would be a bit much seeing as we've really only started courting and I wanna go reeeaaalllyyy slow with relationships.
I hope I'm not being selfish, I really do wanna make this work because I think I can see this relationship going somewhere!
I (20 F) and my partner (20 M) are going through a rough patch in our relationship. I am going into the medical field as a CNA (going to school to be an MA) and have a job lined up that will hopefully accept me, since I’ve already toured the place and had a successful interview. My partner, who I will call Gabe for the sake of privacy, lost his job a few months back and has been trying (or so he’s told me) to get a job as he is also starting school soon to go into computers.
I’ve recently been feeling less like a girlfriend and more like a mother in our relationship, but also a sexualized being. He is very clingy and his love language is physical touch, while mine is gift giving/receiving. He also says things that I’ve told him I feel uncomfortable with at times, such as “I really wanna make out with you” without warning me or asking me if he can say something NSFW. I’ve felt like I’ve been walking on eggshells recently, not trying to stir the pot or anything, but I broke down crying this morning next to him bc I had made plans the other day with a friend after he didn’t text me, so I had assumed he was asleep (he usually sleeps in). It was a really shitty thing to do, I know, and I’ve apologized for it and he accepted it.
I just feel smothered in this relationship and I tried asking for a break but when I did, he said “I have a bit of a trauma response from that” and kind of fumbling over his words talking about his ex, who was a really shit person (I won’t go into details, nothing traumatic but just really asshole stuff). I understand feeling hurt over someone asking to take a break and then never getting back together, but I’ve told him repeatedly that I love him (something I’m starting to question) and I want to stay together, but he just said “we’ll get through this” and now I just feel trapped.
I don’t wanna hurt his feelings, but I don’t think this is healthy. Please help!!