u/Deep-Organization513

i dont understand my current sex life. it’s so good and then i’m completely cut off at the last second. we get these wild nights sometimes and it’s great for both of us but, it’s unstable. majority of the time i’m honestly left disappointed.

foreplay feels good with kissing, grinding, or dirty talk but, in terms of starting to touch gentials it becomes one side. im mostly leading their hand or asking for oral sex. it feels so good the times they’ve done it and i really need to get off from that. i just wish they were able to give and receive at the same time while in different positions.

they’ve explained sex has always been hard for them in that area but, they would try for me, and i just needed to give them time to get better with it. the thing is though, they please me exactly the way i need with really no corrections needed.

i try to guide them into positions during penetration where they are dominant but, i always end up on top. it feels great but, like i said, i get thrown off at the last second. we’ve been able to climax together, and that’s amazing when it happens but, we seem to usually have our timing off.

with been on a rough streak. starting with a failed hotel moment because, they got overwhelmed when i asked for oral. we moved past it and got into different positions but, ultimately ended with me on top being thrown off because, they aren’t okay with ejaculating in me which would give me the chance climax.

i asked about their masturbation habit and they explained they sometimes do but, it’s usually while on video chat with me. he said he didn’t think it was broken, just worked a little bit too good. they also said they didnt see benefit in masturbation due to quick climax with me, and then went on to say that if they could be honest, that’s a part of the reason they don’t really like to.

they told me, word for word, “sex in general. i’ve never really been a fan of it, and that’s partially the reason.” the way i interpreted that made me “oh” but explained it was hard to make sense when they say they aren’t a fan of sex in general, or at least that was my interpretation of what they said. perhaps yes, wrong time, but i got flustered.

i went back to reword and asked “i am genuinely interested and curious about understanding you so, do you feel like you might be in like an area of asexuality?”.

*please correct me if im wrong about the exact labeling of sexuality i’m describing*

they said “i was trying to open up about something serious but, i dont want to talk about it anymore”.

my questions are:
1.) are we simply just sexually incompatible
2.) could it be sensory related?
3.) what things we could try?
4.) how do i initiate a follow up on this conversation to better understand him with his words instead of me trying to make sense with the little bit i have to overthink?
5.) thank you for reading this.. advice is appreciated

i dont understand my current sex life. it’s so good and then i’m completely cut off at the last second. we get these wild nights sometimes and it’s great for both of us but, it’s unstable. majority of the time i’m honestly left disappointed.

foreplay feels good with kissing, grinding, or dirty talk but, in terms of starting to touch gentials it becomes one side. im mostly leading their hand or asking for oral sex. it feels so good the times they’ve done it and i really need to get off from that. i just wish they were able to give and receive at the same time while in different positions.

they’ve explained sex has always been hard for them in that area but, they would try for me, and i just needed to give them time to get better with it. the thing is though, they please me exactly the way i need with really no corrections needed.

i try to guide them into positions during penetration where they are dominant but, i always end up on top. it feels great but, like i said, i get thrown off at the last second. we’ve been able to climax together, and that’s amazing when it happens but, we seem to usually have our timing off.

with been on a rough streak. starting with a failed hotel moment because, they got overwhelmed when i asked for oral. we moved past it and got into different positions but, ultimately ended with me on top being thrown off because, they aren’t okay with ejaculating in me which would give me the chance climax.

i asked about their masturbation habit and they explained they sometimes do but, it’s usually while on video chat with me. he said he didn’t think it was broken, just worked a little bit too good. they also said they didnt see benefit in masturbation due to quick climax with me, and then went on to say that if they could be honest, that’s a part of the reason they don’t really like to.

they told me, word for word, “sex in general. i’ve never really been a fan of it, and that’s partially the reason.” the way i interpreted that made me “oh” but explained it was hard to make sense when they say they aren’t a fan of sex in general, or at least that was my interpretation of what they said. perhaps yes, wrong time, but i got flustered.

i went back to reword and asked “i am genuinely interested and curious about understanding you so, do you feel like you might be in like an area of asexuality?”.

*please correct me if im wrong about the exact labeling of sexuality i’m describing*

they said “i was trying to open up about something serious but, i dont want to talk about it anymore”.

my questions are:
1.) are we simply just sexually incompatible
2.) could it be sensory related?
3.) what things we could try?
4.) how do i initiate a follow up on this conversation to better understand him with his words instead of me trying to make sense with the little bit i have to overthink?
5.) thank you for reading this.. advice is appreciated