u/Delicious-Pie-5730

I’ve been in EMS for a little over 3 years now, and I think it’s time for me to move on. I used to be so passionate about it.

I think I have PTSD. I can barely sleep, and my home life is affected by this job. I have to do everything extremely quickly, even eating meals while I’m off. I scarf my food down and feel sick, I clean my house in an hour and do it so quickly I end up sweaty and exhausted for the day, I have no patience for anyone because they’re doing everything “too slow”.

I can never take a deep breath and relax anymore. My nervous system is completely shot I think from the constant adrenaline dumps and feeling helpless is horrible situations. My worst calls have been pushing into my mind before I sleep, when they never bothered me before. My first suicide call has been at the forefront of it, because I never coped with it when it happened. I’ve tried therapy, and it doesn’t help when I’m constantly being re-exposed to traumatic situations.

As soon as I secure a low stress job, that’s it for me. It’s been real. I admire those of you who can make it to 5 years and beyond that. I think my brain and body just can’t handle it anymore.

I was cast in a student thesis film as the lead actress. It was my first acting gig and I had a lot of fun with it.

HOWEVER, I was just sent the trailer before film festival premiers and I literally could not finish it. Even before opening it I got a rush of adrenaline and I still feel icked out. I do not want to see myself on a screen.

Watching my acting just in the trailer made me want to crawl out of my skin and I feel like it looks so fake. YUCK. How do I get over this? Is this a normal feeling? There’s a family/friends screening coming up and I don’t know if I’ll be able to watch it without covering my eyes the whole time. I’m also worried I’ll spiral into self hatred if I force myself to watch it.

Hi everyone, I (25f) have been diagnosed with BPD for 5 years now. I’ve been doing really well until recently.

My spouse and I are in the process of buying a home. We’re getting close to closing and we have so much packing to do and expenses coming up.

With all the stress and financial worries, I’ve noticed I feel very hyper-critical of my spouse. This usually only happens when I’m stressed out. I keep interpreting her actions as intentional or malicious, but I can’t tell the difference between my perception and reality.

I interpret her words and even the way she looks at me in a negative way, and it’s causing issues because I can’t explain exactly what’s bothering me.

It’s also intolerable to be seen or interact with anyone right now, including family and even coworkers. It feels “exposed” and like people are thinking or saying bad things about me. At work I don’t say a word to anyone all day and I feel extremely anxious if someone interacts with me.

Does anyone else deal with this? Does anything help? I can’t stop the stress since buying a house is just stressful period.

Just wanted to share. I got my EMT-A after a couple years of being a basic (I don’t want to be a medic, leave me alone). I’ve had a slew of bullshit calls one after the other lately. I was starting to feel grumpy and burnt out. Even looked for other jobs.

Today I had an anaphylactic shock. I was focused, I did the IV like it was second nature, I gave meds that made a difference. The patient went from unresponsive to talking to me and laughing within 10 minutes. My training officer said I did a good job and he’s proud of me.

Will I stay in EMS forever? No, probably not. But today I actually helped someone. And I used my skills that I worked so hard to excel at. I feel really good and I’m proud of myself.