u/Dergz_R_Us

My Q has once again relapsed and recently was hospitalized for withdrawals from Alcohol and 7OH. This is the 2nd time since January and 3rd time overall. He’s been to rehab twice but maintains he doesn’t have an alcohol problem he just needs to drink less. He did get a sublocade shot this time for the opioid but I have little faith he won’t find a way around it or a different drug.

I recently received a message from a friend of his I’ve never met. He sent a weird meme alluding to the idea that I practice voodoo on my Q. (Which is laughably untrue) and that I needed to be nice to him.
When I asked my Q about it he said it’s because of the voodoo candles I purchased from a New Orleans gift shop that I brought home for friends and memories. And he told his buddy he thinks I’m using it to control him and keep him in the relationship (Again laughable)

The timing of the all this coincides with his last ICU stay and bender. So I told this “friend” if he truly cares about him he should know the actual truth. And proceeded to tell him all the dates of every hospital stay, rehab stay, how my Qs family won’t help and have told me it’s a decade long problem, and how he’s going to die if he doesn’t get help.
And if he’s friends enough with him to harass ne with memes and tell me to be nice over untrue voodoo stories I’m sure told while inebriated maybe he’s a goood enough friend to talk to him about his addiction.

I even said my Q is free to leave and live with him in California if it meant him getting sober and being successful. My messages were vulnerable and heartfelt.

Well this person stabbed me in the back and told
My Q I was “talking shit” and discussing his private matters

And now my Q is furious telling me I’ve betrayed him in unbelievable ways.

How does he not see his addiction is the ultimate betrayal the broken promises, the lies, the talking shit about me to his friend and this weird voodoo lie. Who knows what else.

And why do they have so many people willing to defend their behavior?

AITA

Edit- It’s known and agreed by both my boyfriend and I that this is my nieces change jar. It’s for her and things for her. we call it “her name” jar. And if there’s spare change we say “don’t forget to grab her names change. Or pick up a coin from the ground and say “for name”

Me 37F created a change jar for my niece, a piggy bank of sorts. I have had this jar since 2018 and I just throw whatever random change I have in it. Which in this day and age of no cash isn’t much but it’s just something little I do for her.

Over the last 3.5 years my boyfriend (37M) has added his spare change for her as well.

Today I (37F) was cleaning my spare room when I noticed this change jar that is designated for my niece was half empty. I called my boyfriend (37M) immediately as he is the only one that would have access to this jar. I asked him did you take money from my nieces piggy bank.

He replied that yes it’s only $48 he needed gas to get to work and he’s gonna pay it back. I asked him when did he take this money and he said sometime earlier this week.

I told him this is entirely unacceptable, not only did he take from a child, he did so without communication.

He told me I wasn’t home and we were fighting so he forgot to tell me and it’s not a big deal he’s going to pay it back.

I told him it’s a huge deal once money enters that’s jar it’s ceases to be mine or his, it is the child’s.

And that his financial irresponsibility shouldn’t be bailed out by a child’s piggy bank.

He think I’m overreacting, categorizing this wrong and painting him to be a thief. He claims he simply forgot to tell me he did it and it’s not a big deal because he added money over the last 4 years and he’s going to pay it back.

I told him I’m physically ill and I don’t recognize him. That this is deception and theft

He’s upset that I called him at work to confront him

AITA?