u/Disco_Duck_12576

​

Im about 2 mouths post breakup with my first long term girlfriend who as far as I can tell is an avoident. Just when things where going good she suddenly went a 180 and within a little over too weeks broke up with me saying she had a lot of stuff going on in her life and a relationship wasn't what she needed right now, and that she still wanted to be friends, but has obviously choosen hard distance from me.

I have managed to stop monitoring her social media accounts and stuff, but im in a situation where I still have to see her a lot in person and we have mutual friends. For her it seems to not even be affecting her and she tried to get into another relationship with a girl only like 2 weeks after we broke up like it meant nothing and it hurts. 2 mouths in I feel like she might have actually got in another relationship and yeah that stings, but what almost hurts more is I feel like im stuck in the mud processing and trying to figure out things from the relationship.

I have definitely changed with this being my first breakup, but I see her going off and trying to get with other people when I don't even want to date anyone else right now let alone actually find someone and build a romantic relationship with them. Like I said she was my first girlfriend so she is also my only reference point of me being able to get a girlfriend. I don't want to try and rebound if I found someone I truly liked again, but I do still miss the feeling of having that person who is yours.

Even if I keep changing I don't even know how much progress I have truly made if its enough or there are just so many uncertainties and Im struggling to not compare my progress with my ex. While I honestly still want her to be happy and I can normally talk about her without being super emotionally charged all the time im just struggling to navigate a breakup for the first time and grow into someone better for another person when they come along, because all things considered I don't see my ex coming back and if she does (and yes I think it has tk be her who reaches out first) im just not sure how I would feel now.

Im about 2 mouths post breakup with my first long term girlfriend who as far as I can tell is an avoident. Just when things where going good she suddenly went a 180 and within a little over too weeks broke up with me saying she had a lot of stuff going on in her life and a relationship wasn't what she needed right now, and that she still wanted to be friends, but has obviously choosen hard distance from me.

I have managed to stop monitoring her social media accounts and stuff, but im in a situation where I still have to see her a lot in person and we have mutual friends. For her it seems to not even be affecting her and she tried to get into another relationship with a girl only like 2 weeks after we broke up like it meant nothing and it hurts. 2 mouths in I feel like she might have actually got in another relationship and yeah that stings, but what almost hurts more is I feel like im stuck in the mud processing and trying to figure out things from the relationship.

I have definitely changed with this being my first breakup, but I see her going off and trying to get with other people when I don't even want to date anyone else right now let alone actually find someone and build a romantic relationship with them. Like I said she was my first girlfriend so she is also my only reference point of me being able to get a girlfriend. I don't want to try and rebound if I found someone I truly liked again, but I do still miss the feeling of having that person who is yours.

Even if I keep changing I don't even know how much progress I have truly made if its enough or there are just so many uncertainties and Im struggling to not compare my progress with my ex. While I honestly still want her to be happy and I can normally talk about her without being super emotionally charged all the time im just struggling to navigate a breakup for the first time and grow into someone better for another person when they come along, because all things considered I don't see my ex coming back and if she does (and yes I think it has tk be her who reaches out first) im just not sure how I would feel now.