u/DoughnutOk7787

I F25 have been with M28 on and off since we were teenagers. There have been some gaps of time between dating with the latest being two years passing before reconnecting. There are trust issues on both sides that we are trying to overcome.

Yesterday I had a bit of a meltdown over some past things that triggered me involving social media. I commented on his Instagram photo and shortly after he disabled his comments. He also posted me on his story but wouldn’t tag me? Which led me to wonder if he hid his story from anyone. I reacted poorly and told him that if he doesn’t turn his comments back on I must leave bc it is something that I can’t handle. For context when we were younger I would comment on his photos and he’d delete it to hide me from women he was talking to. We got into a big fight eventually making up and coming to a compromise.

I slept at his house and noticed that he had a miscall in the middle of the night I asked him about this and he stated that it was his male friend I felt uneasy about it but am working on giving him the benefit of the doubt. I woke up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and noticed his phone had 4 missed called. My curiosity and lack of trust got the best of me so I looked through his phone he messaged his ex while we were fighting yesterday. I didn’t see his messages bc he deleted them all but I saw her most recent ones of her asking him if he’s still coming over tn etc. I then saw recent screenshots of previous sex tapes he has on his camera roll.

He is admitting that it was wrong that he messaged his ex but blaming me for my meltdown yesterday saying I drove him to it. As for the screen shots he says that there is nothing wrong with that and he “likes watching people suck his dick” and it’s just porn. However, they are all of women he has had prior relationships with. AIO ab the sex tapes or is that a clear violation in a relationship?

Follow up question. I have not been handling this rebuilding of trust well. Did I drive him to do this?