u/Downtown-Chest-3816

I have a small connecting flight in about 3 hours which is an hour on a 738 which I feel OK about I guess since it’s only an hour but after I have a long flight on a 787-9

It’s from Calgary to Rome this evening and I’m a wreck!

I just panic with turbulence, it put such stress on my body to be waiting for a bump the whole 10 hour flight I can’t calm down despite taking medication. I really need reassurance right now. I need tips I know to pick my feet up off the ground during bumps but sometimes I feel like the plane is out of control or could become out of control any moment and I can’t get off.

Is anyone able to see what the rough weather forecast will be for my flight tonight it’s at 7pm Calgary time?

I’m even more scared about take off honestly. I think the issue with Vietnamese airlines has me scared too.

I just need serious reassurance and like what should I do? Should I pull a flight attendant aside during boarding to tell them about my fear or what??? Please help

I have a long term fear of flying which seems to never have got any better with time, it’s got worse. I’ve taken two long haul round trips to Japan on the 787 in the past two years and my last return flight was horrible which I think is making me feel really anxious right now. It was just at night, bumpy and there was lightning.

My doctor has prescribed me medication for flights and even with that Im still on high alert the whole flight waiting for turbulence to hit or anticipating drops or the sensation of drops. Its exhausting. I am unable to do anything else except listen to music and stare out the window, looking at the little flap on the 787 that activates during bumps to try to prepare myself for turbulence, it’s that’s bad. Even medicated I am on edge and waiting for something to go wrong.

The worst parts for me are the anticipating of going on the flight and then getting on and taking off. Cruising im anxious the entire time it’s so ridiculous I can’t do anythung to distract myself.

Now im going to Rome in a couple days on another 787 and im just absolutely torn. Im so scared I can’t stop having panic attacks I can’t sleep I can’t eat it’s really bad. I genuinely feel as though these are my last few days on earth. I am reminding myself the stats, looking at flight radar to see all the active planes, trying to meditate, reminding myself turbulence isn’t dangerous, but I am a total wreck and really need help so desperately.

I have been with him for 6 years now. The issue to be brief is obviously his porn use. Its been an issue for a long time but the past year and a half he was genuinely clean and I know this because we moved across the world for a year and were in each others presence so much. The sex was completely different he could finish quick, eye contact, no weird shit. I know him so well that I can tell instantly when he uses.

Well the past 3 months since we got home (live seperately with our families) have been shit again. He’s started using again and he keeps saying he’s gonna quit and he always tells me the same day he uses but it keeps happening. He randomly sent me $2000 to keep and only give it back if he makes it to the end of this year without using. That was two weeks ago and I could tell a few days ago he used. He couldn’t finish. Today he admitted he used and did again today.

He asked me for the money back to use it for counselling… Im confused what to do.

Ontop of this the bigger issue is that his view of sex is absolutely ducked I feel. He almost feels entitled to sex and gets moody and irritated when I say no. We’ve had convos about this and he knows it isn’t ok and he tries to improve but I still notice it.

My boyfriend and I got into an argument today, we tend to get into disagreements fairly often lately. We have been together five years now.

The argument to put it short was that I was unaware he was texting with one of our mutual female friends after he mentioned it so I asked him what they talk about and he jumped to “you don’t trust me?” And I was like “of course I do, I was just unaware you were in contact like that. It triggered an insecurity in me I apologize I just wanted to express my feelings to your face rather than hiding them.” He opened their texts but started scrolling through them as if to check before showing me and I kinda looked at him weird and he got really defensive and then was like “you can look through my whole phone I can’t believe you would think I’d cheat on you” and I said I really do not want to look through your phone I just wanted to ask what you both talk about since I was unaware and I think after 5 years we should both be able to ask a question like that. They were texting on Snapchat about gift ideas for her boyfriend, all innocent although it’s Snapchat so I could only see the past 24 hours. I have never asked him questions like this before I never look through his phone and this was a one off because I genuinely was surprised they were in casual texting contact. Usually we all communicate (me, my bf, the girl, and her bf) in a group chat because it is my bf’s best friends gf.

I was trying to explain my feelings using “I feel” statements and was very calm and took accountability for my part being that the question came off accusatory. While I was talking I notice him shutting his eyes in annoyance, rolling his eyes, chuckling, sighing and just visibly annoyed.

I call him out on it and say can we please just communicate like adults I feel dismissed when you act like that while I express my feelings. He said “we are you just upset me by asking to know what we text about you don’t trust me”

I began to cry a little despite trying not to because I felt dismissed and this does happen quite a bit where I notice he gets visibly annoyed and irritated with me in disagreements.

At this point I told him I don’t feel comfortable continuing the conversation and I asked him to leave my place. He got his stuff and left, slamming the door on the way out which woke my roommate up.

I understand his perspective and I know I’m not perfect but instead of my vulnerability being met with understanding he jumps to irritation and annoyance.

I’m just wanting advice as to whether this is a communication problem that can be worked through or if this is an entirely unhealthy dynamic. How can we communicate better?

TL:DR; when my boyfriend and I get in disagreements I notice he often gets irritated and annoyed and will roll his eyes, sigh, chuckle and be dismissive while I speak.