Okay. Generating humorous response.
Searching for unexpected poultry-based subversion.
“…to optimise travel efficiency.”
No.
“…because humans find directional bird movement amusing.”
Closer.
Hungarians
It’s only a matter of time till they invade Turkey
(Sorry)
Or is it that if the crowds big enough it doesn’t matter that some people aren’t laughing
Obviously this doesn’t apply to an audience that’s specifically come to see the comedian so they are all gonna have the similar sense of humour
I started going gym, eating healthier, picked up a hobby, read self-help, started crying a lot (in touch with my emotions)
In my relationship I was happy
which is terrible for personal growth
Happy people don’t have abs
What I need to be is driven by revenge
But its starting to fade. I’m losing the fuel. The fire.
I need to get dumped again. Fast
For my own health and wellbeing
I’ve got to try and force myself to fall in love organically and then get blindsided
This is the healthiest way to live
Now I’ve gotta find the lucky lady
Would this be a premise worth exploring or would people just feel sorry for me?
It was kinda funny. I called her to let her know how excited I was to eat some takeaway chicken and chips and she hit me with the ‘Look, I’m not happy’. Thought she meant she wasn’t happy that I was eating chicken and chips for some reason. I asked if she wanted me to get her some chicken and she said no she didn’t want to be with me anymore. Talk about whiplash.
I like to make instant noodles and instant coffee to see which is faster
The Tour de France has gotta be the most exhausting tour I’ve ever been on
I went to Madagascar and none of the animals there could even talk. False advertising
If you’re going to commit a crime make sure it’s not a true crime. Just commit A crime. Then there won’t be a Netflix documentary about it
A trick to stop your ice-cream melting, just order the cone. Okay more of a cup crowd, learn to live a little
I think the New Zealand rugby team needs to be more racially inclusive
I’ve always been told everybody deserves rights but I think everyone deserves lefts too (sorry)
My great grandfather gave me some great advice. Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man 2 fish and he’ll eat for 2 days. Give a man 3 fish and now you have a loyal customer. Whatever you do DON’T teach him to fish. Cause then he’ll open up with his own fish shop and now you have competition…my great grandfather and most of his family drowned in a boating accident
Did you know in 1905 women’s corsets were made out of whale bone. How big were women back then?
Pierre Cornu built the first prototype vertical take-off helicopter. After his prototype horizontal take-off helicopter crashed into a wall
Nobel prize is a prize without a bell. If it wasn’t meant to come with a bell why would they clarify it’s absence. Okay obviously you guys have never won a prize before
I’m colourblind so I can’t join the navy
I thought I would do nothing with my life until I found this. I was numb. Nothing excited me. I finally found something I enjoy and that I’m good at
I love everything about it. The more I do it and the more I learn the more I love it.
I love the feeling of entertaining an audience
I love how hard it is
I love how sometimes it feels easy
I love the instant feedback
I love the feeling of making a room full of people with different backgrounds and opposite politics laugh
I love the comradely between comics
I love how there’s no rule book
I love how many different ways there are to be funny
Above all I love that it’s given me a purpose. I make barely any money, I have to do a job I hate during the day. I write when my manager isn’t looking and write in my head when he is. I’m probably gonna get fired. I don’t care. Anticipating getting up on stage makes it worth it. I’m a year in, I have no idea if I’m going to end up making any money. My only goal in life is to get on stage as much as possible and spend time with my family/friends
To the more experienced comics. Does this go away. If by some miracle I become successful at this or just enough to sustain myself, will I still love it. Do you still love it after all these years? Are you all reading this and thinking how naive and cringe I am?