i feel like we're creating our own religious bubble
EDIT: in no way at all is this a defense of the hadith or its story, nor do I believe that she was 6 or 9; I use this as an example of the latest topic that made me confused.
First of all, let me express my respect for this subreddit and its members. I think you guys are truly respectable human beings who are actually seeking a more understanding and accepting version of Islam, not just people who want to follow their desires within a religious context, as a lot of outsiders view this subreddit
But I still sometimes feel we pick singular opinions that match our current views, which, as you can see in my user flair, led me to actually start doubting Islam
i'm going to use this case as an example, even though it's not my only concern: Aisha's age
The hadith in which her young age is mentioned is found in almost all of the hadith books, whether we like it or not, it's one of the most documented "facts" in the context of hadith
Yet still, I used to say that no, she was 18 due to this and that, with some points that I actually believed to be valid
But now i'm just not sure do i beleive they're actually valid points? or did i want to believe that, so I just accepted the very first "proof" that i found to match my feelings
which makes me feel like any research i do has confirmation bias. Confirmation bias is when you claim to be "researching" something or looking for the truth in a certain topic, when in fact you already have a certain belief that you're looking for evidence to back it up, not searching for the abstract truth
I feel that's how I dealt with cases like hijab, prayer, music, and everything that i thought I believed or reached a comfortable outcome towards
And all this confusion is not leading me towards radical Islam, I feel it's taking me back to being agnostic again
Currently, I'm very confused, I feel like i'm losing my faith day by day, I've stopped praying for a while now