How does it feel to be loved?
I’m 24, and I’ve never really felt loved by the people around me.
Growing up, my parents treated me differently from my sibling. Whenever I brought it up, they blamed me for noticing it instead of understanding my feelings.
In my entire 24 years of life, I’ve never had someone I could call my best friend. At 16, I had a small friend group of three whom I trusted. I always had their backs, but they started hanging out without me, keeping secrets, and stopping conversations whenever I approached. I felt unwanted and left out.
At 23, I experienced my first love. He liked me a lot, planned a trips, dates for us, and we had wonderful times together. Whenever I was wrong about something, he would explain it to me without making me feel stupid or making me feel bad about myself. I gave him love, peace, understanding, and personal space. He even told me how comfortable it was to be with me. For the first time, I thought someone genuinely loved me. But after one year, he suddenly went back to his ex. I still don’t know why.
Sometimes, I look at other people and wonder what it’s like to have someone who genuinely chooses you. Someone who considers you their best friend, someone who wants to tell you everything, someone who notices when you’re not okay, and someone who doesn’t make you question whether you matter to them.
I just wanted to be loved. I don’t understand why I struggle to keep people in my life, and I get too attached when someone shows me affection.
For those who have experienced genuine love, what does it feel like to be loved and truly chosen by someone?