u/Dull_Revolution_9952

I was raised in a somewhat strict household where I wasn't allowed to talk to girls and even talking to my cousin of similar age was deemed weird. When I was in primary school I had a weird idea to avoid women and girls at all costs, and ran away from my female teachers / neighbours / family whenever they tried to interact with me 😂

Now I'm in my early 20s, and I'm genuinely scared to talk to women (of similar age) my heart starts beating before talking to them even when they approach me in public I completely blank out.

Somehow i was the only one affected by this out of my 3 other siblings. so if it's not too late, and if anyone has any advice, I’d really appreciate it. (and please just don't make fun of me Ik it's embarrassing 😭)

When I try to buy something from someone online or through a marketplace, I never really know how the phone call is supposed to go. what questions should I ask, how should I talk, and how can I avoid sounding awkward or inexperienced so I don’t become an easy target for scams or manipulation?

what title says

(21m) My whole life, since I was 10 years old, people have told me that I have potential to be great. I had good grades while hardly studying. My math teachers told me that I always find smart solutions, think outside the box, and that I have the word “potential.” My family told me that. My brother, who is a researcher, told me that. My teachers in university are still telling me that.

But I never saw it in myself. All I ever thought (and still think) I’m good at is damage control. I’m lazy, addicted to por-nography and entertainment, unorganized, with no work ethic, and I suffer from brain fog. I thrive under chaos or when there’s a tight deadline, but if it’s anything else, I can’t bring myself to work.

I get majorly depressed, anxious, and full of self-loathing all the time. I’m turning 22 in the next couple of months, and even though I’ve tried a lot of things to fix this problem (read books, read res-earch, and tried to apply it but failed). I still feel stuck between what everyone says I could be and what I keep proving to myself I am.