u/East_Sheepherder_735

I know this question is a little silly, but I genuinely don’t know the first thing about meeting people or making new friends.

I haven’t made a single in-person friend since 2018, and the only one I have, we don’t really talk much anymore; I haven’t made any new online friends since 2023, and only 2 I still keep in contact with, nobody else contacts me or replies to my messages.

It’s becoming such a struggle not having friends given my mental health has been on a steep decline; I’ve been feeling really lonely and isolated, and I just don’t have anyone to talk to - not even to vent or anything, but just to bond with; there’s nobody I can talk to.

I want to be able to talk to people outside of my family and work (because as much as they’re all lovely, I’ve not gotten close or “friendly” with any of them in the almost 9 months I’ve known them), and because my relationship with my family is becoming more strained, especially with how I’m realising I’m trans, and they wouldn’t be supportive of that.

I’m just not really sure how to make friends; if there’s any things I do/don’t / should/shouldn’t do? Or even where or how to meet people - is it as simple as just saying hi to someone in the street, or is it not that easy?

I think also what makes it difficult to make friends is that, as an autistic introvert, I don’t really have an interest in someone unless they’re interested in me, so I won’t engage in conversation or anything unless they want to; I don’t really ”click” with people, or at least haven’t for years; and that my interests don’t align with most people and there’s nothing to bond over; and also, people around my age are either in their final year of college (post 16 because UK), or are at uni, of which people will already have friend groups and wouldn’t be interested in meeting someone new.

It’s not that I haven’t tried making friends before; I just don’t think I’m good at it or know what I’m doing. Even at anime conventions, I’ve gone up to cosplayers and initiated conversation; talk about mutual interests; and give them a little drawing with my socials on the back in case they want to talk or meet up - but it really goes nowhere. And if I’m not the one initiating conversation, nobody even tries to approach or acknowledge me; am I doing something wrong?

I just want some friends, man..

I just can’t see myself growing any older than my 20s, and even thinking myself in 10 years time at 28 feels impossible.

I was thinking to myself that maybe it’s gender dysphoria, and that I can’t see myself growing old as a woman, but it doesn’t seem to be the case; I just don’t think I want to be alive for much longer.

I think I’ve just kind of accepted the fact that I’ll die early; I know how I plan on doing it. I don’t have any ambitions in life; little to no interests in any of my hobbies or things I like; can’t motivate myself to find a job I like, or learn to drive; I have no social circle outside of my family (whom of which I’m getting more distant from every day) - I doubt I’ll ever be able to afford a place to live in my own; the thought of having a friend group/best friend is completely foreign; I’d love a relationship, but it just seems completely impossible given I’ve never once liked or even found anyone attractive in the slightest.

I feel bad for having basically wasted my life up until now because I’m not mentally strong or capable enough, but I really just can’t see a way to get out of this that’s not cutting my own life short. I wish I could live a fulfilling life with a partner, pets, and a place of my own, but I just don’t have any desire or ambition to keep going.

I’m keeping on holding out for longer, because maybe, just maybe, things will one day get better (and also because my family, as much as they don’t like me, they still love and care about me, and I’d feel awful for leaving and making them sad)

But how much longer can I keep this hope when things are just getting worse every day?

Sorry if this question isn’t allowed, but as someone who is considering T and intends to get into vo as a hobby (for now, eventually as a job or side hussle), I’m curious about how the voice changes (either getting deeper, higher, and the voice cracks) have affected your work and roles and stuff. Or has having voice control helped avoid any issues you might’ve come across?

It’s been one of my biggest recent roadblocks in trying to start va work and auditions, and I feel like this is a question that would be better answered through other peoples experiences as opposed to just searching it up and seeing what Google gives me