I used to self harm a lot I haven't done it for a long time I still have really bad urges I'm really struggling on getting rid of them at some points and focusing on well enough self-control to keep myself from doing it but I feel like The area where I used to do it crazy so badly it hurts not to It's like a drug I want to make it stop can someone please help
I was unable to get this to post on advice so I came here 18M And my girlfriend 18F I've been going through a hard time recently I've known her for 6 years we went to middle school together but then she moved away and I've always kept in contact
I've always loved her and cared about her we decided to try things even through the distance for the past 11 months and things have been pretty well but recently things have been hard and confusing
We've had three trips with each other and each time something happens and one of us gets upset each other I've said and done the wrong thing and I've hurt her feelings and she's done the same to me on our last trip she said something that hurt my feelings And I also felt a overwhelmed into situations when I met her friends and her family And she was also pretty upset at me because of this she said to me she feels like she has to watch what she says and not make the same kind of jokes or not give her opinion if it might make me think differently of her
we just have some disagreements last night we had a talk she told me that she feels like she always hurts my feelings or makes me feel overwhelmed and feels like I don't communicate it fast enough to her which is true I also feel like I fucked up a lot I've done the wrong things forgotten what she said at times And I'v hurt her feelings And that is something I'm working on And she's going through a hard time and has a lot of stress and I love her so much not a single part of me feels that she hurts me too much And also feels like I see here differently after knowing some of her opinions which It's not true I got really scared it seemed like the conversation was it leading to us breaking up I love her with all my heart
And I'm scared I'm going to lose her how can communicate to her that I'm so scared I'm going to lose The person I want to spend my life with It's bringing me to tears thinking about it how can I make her not be scared of hurting me by making jokes or putting me in weird situation
TLDR how can I get her to be herself and to not overthink or be stressed about what she says around me