u/Educational_Ad5448

Ciao a tutti, sono un ragazzo di 27 anni ed intorno Ottobre dovrei trasferirmi per motivi lavorativi intorno Firenze. La sede di lavoro sarebbe a Calenzano ma avevo intenzione di trovare un appartamento in Novoli, in quanto mi hanno parlato di come sia un quartiere giovane e vivibile. Sapere dirmi qualcosa di più? È conveniente la percorrenza per il lavoro, come si vive un fine settimana tipo? Vi ringrazio in anticipo per le risposte

Hello everybody, I need to vent and I need to talk to somebody that has gone through something similar.

I (27M) have a relationship of about 9 months with this girl (29F) but its been stuck for a while.

We started seeing each other last summer and we hit it off pretty well. September came around and she made the move, so we started this relationship with the premise of "we will see where this goes, but we are committed to get serious". And it started beatiful: I was at her house most of the weekends and we were going out and having fun. This went on till January. She then started getting colder and asked for a bit of distance. I agreed and the time together became facetiming more than actual presence. Since January her life went sideways:

​

-Her grandma died, she was her only family member that she loved. We had a fight because she didnt want me at the function. I did not go and I regret it deeply. I then spent the next three days at her house providing for her, because she literally couldn't.

-She is losing her job, the bank she works at is closing.

-She lost her friends group, because of the distance mainly and different lifestyles.

​

She started Zoloft then on advice frome her analyst.

​

After all this we had a big fight where she told me she was not ready for a relationship and we would be going on holidays as friends. I then told her I could not do it as friends and that it would be better to split up. After a few days of silence she asked me what to do with my stuff at her home. And then we started talking again. And she chased me to get me in that house again. I then went and she was happy as ever, she literally took my clothes off as soon as she could. Then the holidays came, and it was 4 days of having a roommate, I tried to turn her on a bit, but she was not receptive.

​

Last week she was pretty sick, so I went and got her groceries, made her dinner. She told me I was a saint and that she do not deserve me. A couple of days later she invited me to dinner. Got there, ate some sushi and watched a world cup game. Then I kissed her, we kissed for two long hours but she was feeling guilty because she dont deserve me. I then for the first time told her that I love her, what I do love about her and that I am no saint, I stick around because she is my person.

Since then its back to facetiming, I proposed a couple of dates, but all I got was silence. I feel stuck. Feel free to ask any questions, to DM. I just need to talk.

​

TL:DR, Got in a relationship with what I guess is an avoidant girl. I do love her and I just feel stuck in a loop.

Hello everybody, I am sorry if this is the umpteenth post about this subject, but I really do need advice. My 29M girlfriend of 1 year has started Zoloft about a month ago. Since we started dating her life has gone downhill, she lost a close relative and her job, along with almost all her friends. She then decided to get help and I encouraged her to. Since then I have felt her pretty distant, she chats about her day constantly with me, but seems to not really want to interact in presence. She was feeling sick a couple days ago and I went to her to cook her dinner and take care of her. She told me that she has nothing to offer to the relationship and that she is feeling "asexuate". I am not really worried about the sex drive because I was aware of it, but the emotional distance is starting to take the toll on me. Any stories or advice would probably help. Thank you a lot