Coworker keeps saying the most useless, inane things and gets mad that I don't validate her
So I (41M) work with a middle-aged female coworker in the F&B business, and I think things just came to a head last night.
My read on her situation is that she is a lonely person (not necessarily romantically but just in general) and keeps seeking validation - I dont know if its specifically from me, or everyone in general. And quite frankly, she says the most useless, inane things that I dont know how to respond to, and she gets pissy and irritated when I dont respond.
Some examples of things she has said:
- Her phone is on the ground, and she places an apple on top of it. She then says "oh look! I have an apple phone!"
- She looks at a mop bucket that has a bunch of hair stuck in the strainer from after mopping. "Oh jeez, I wonder how much DNA is in there!"
- And last night she was listening to some gospel/praise music out loud on her phone. With a lot of these gospel/praise concerts, there is a lot of prayer/worshipping involved where the singer doesnt sing. During one of those monologues, she asks me if I know the song...
The singer is clearly not singing, and I take a moment to think how I should explain to her, without making her feel dumb, that I dont know what song it is because he is not singing the song.
And of course, she gets pissy/frustrated that I dont respond immediately.
Later on in shift, she hands me a drink that a customer didn't pick up for me to drink. I tell her thanks, and she... hesitates for a few seconds with a disdainful look on her face, clearly getting back at me for the previous conversation about the singer.
Later, she opens up her lunch Tupperware and starts saying something about her vegetables, I clearly was not interested at that point, I did not want to entertain her or put up with her begging for attention.
Even more later on in the shift, as I'm talking to another coworker and walking backwards, I accidentally bump into her. I say, "oh, I'm sorry!" She responds with "no, youre fine!" And then looks at me and smiles... and stares.
Ok, a few minutes later I see her again and she looks at me and smiles again...
Is this... is this what I think it is?
Whatever the case, I just do not have the mental or emotional space to constantly validate this person.
I will say, to be fair, that I do have a bit of a reputation at work for not listening to people well. I have been dealing with health issues for over a decade that does impede my ability to manage my emotions, and therefore ability to respond to people well.
But honestly... there's nothing I can do it. It sounds like an excuse, but I genuinely do not have the capacity because of my health issues.
WIBTA if I just ignored or Grey rocked her? Or AITA for not entertaining and responding to everyone's attempts at small talk?