u/Electrical-Weird-859

I have become so bitter and started resenting people, and I genuinely wish I could go back to my old self. Every night is almost depressing. When I was in High School, I fell in love with a girl but she never really liked me back and I also wasn’t allowed to date back then. I thought dating would become better, I always wanted a family of my own. Love them the same way my parents did to my family. I’m starting to think that’s impossible these days. Unfortunately, I am not extremely attractive or average height. I am more like 5’8(23M), and I’m not obese but I am a bit overweight but I go to the gym quite often. The thing is I’ve always been told I am a funny guy, and very respectful and people’s parents want their kids to be as respectful as me. Reality is women, don’t care about that. Approaching women is out of the option because women don’t want to approached, dating apps don’t work for guys like me. I graduated college and now I work a 6 figure job, sure that’s great but I am not happy in life. I can travel the world, but I want a best friend to do it with, a partner. I also am still a virgin unfortunately which really bothers me. There is this girl, who wants to go out with me but she has 60 bodies and won’t sleep with me till we start actually dating. If i’m being honest, I don’t want a relationship with her. I told her that body count is way too much for me, if she wants to be FWB with me I’d gladly be that but she doesn’t want to do that either which is totally fine. Some of you might advise me, oh get a hooker they are good. Do I really want to sleep with a hooker? I don’t think women as sex dolls nor am I tryna just hit and dip I have sexual desires too, I’m a human being like all of you. I don’t want anyone judging me just because I want to lose my virginity. I want to find someone, who I actually want to do it with and hopefully start a family. Every date I’ve been on, women just used me for a free dinner, while some other dude is clapping for free. I am not even expecting sex on the first date, i just want to go on a 2nd maybe 3rd date have sex and fall in love. Since that is probably never going to happen, I’ve resorted to losing my virginity but that doesn’t seem like happening either. I just want to stop being addicted to porn, find someone to actually mate with and carry on my bloodline which is probably never going to happen.