u/Electrical_Army7097

Has anyone stopped spironolactone and experienced an insane amount of blue veins pop up all over your body? I was on spironolactone for more than a year and got off because of side effects. Little did I know that I would be dealing with uncomfortable body pains in my feet/legs/arms after stopping and now the veins on all of these body parts are very visible. I’m so insecure now about it and it makes me regret taking this medication😢

I have been depressed since I can remember. Things have gotten better after heavy drug/drinking issues as a teen. I pulled myself through my rock bottoms and graduated high-school/college, worked a few jobs, made a few friends. Got sober. I worked my ass off to change every bad habit and situation into strength and wisdom.

However during all of these amazing moments I still felt incredibly depressed and suicidal, hating everything about myself and my life. This has caused such a chronic fatigue that’s gotten worse each year. As a drift from my childhood years into an adult body I never asked for, I question everything around me. Being an empath and a giver has drained me to completion. All though I’ve fought with all of my soul to be healthier by working out, eating healthier, growing/expanding my mind, taking better care of myself, it always feels like the odds are against me. The physical and mental challenges I have faced to just EXIST, are beyond my worst nightmare. This past fall/winter took the cake for the worst “seasonal depression” I’ve ever had. I dropped out of school because of a mental breakdown, stopped taking my meds and completely stopped participating in the world. No friends no life lived beyond these four walls. It has been so hard to smile or hold a conversation when I really just wish I could disappear. I’m not the same happy/optimistic person I used to be, even if my smile was fake and I was barely holding on back then, there was more hope then I have now. I’m just sitting here rotting wasting my life, wishing for this to be over already. I can barely look at myself, shower or get out of bed. I see no point in any of this life stuff. The scariest part of this all is the numbness and anhedonia I’ve developed. I lost all of my passion and I’m being completely honest this time I don’t think there’s any saving myself. I wouldn’t wish this heaviness on anyone. And if you’re reading this and can relate I love you and I’m sorry you feel this way. I can’t guarantee it’ll get better but know that you’re not alone.

I’m not sure why but time feels to be moving incredibly fast. What is going on? 🫪