u/Electronic_Cat_6175

Even when I was rejecting complementarism ("men are leaders and women are helpers" nonsense), this is the message I got: that I was transgressing against God and I was just prideful (how awesome that questioning any teaching is rebelling against God, how convenient!)

I know if I come out this is the stuff my mom will throw at me, and although she's one of the most compassionate people I've met, I don't know if I'm strong enough for my whole church and half of my family to think of me as just "brainwashed" or "rebelling against God".

People don't get it when you tell them this is who you are, because they think it's just another sin (the sin of lying or rebelling I guess? Idk) that you're "glorifying" and "we're called to deny ourselves".

So many times these things get used to supress people and stop them from questioning the status quo. A thought-terminating cliche if you will.

So, how should I deal with "deny yourself" and "our hearts are deceptive" claims?

I'm trying to make a chest binder for myself as a trans person, and I need a way to close it somehow. I have health issues which make it so that I'm prone to injury if I try to for example fit on tight clothing (or take it off) without any zippers/buttons/etc, so I can't just make it fully closed and stretchy.

The reason buttons don't work is that they poke through my shirt if they're at the front, and if they're in the back, it's the same injury/pain thing again. Velcro makes a lot of noise so I don't think I'll use that. I have newer sewn anything with zippers before, so idk how that would work.

Do you have recommendations?

I'm in a very conservative church and I'm getting baptised in a couple of months. (The idea is also that I would join the church officially/on paper upon my baptism which I don't really want to do because I know I won't be accepted, but I also am not in a place where I want to try and explain to my mom and the church why I don't want to join...) The interview they do to see if I'm serious about Christianity is probably the same as the "do you agree with out churhc's required confession" interview. The confession which they require from every member includes "God made us man and woman", which to them means no transgender people, especially no enbies like me, and I'm afraid I'll have to out myself, but even if I don't, I feel like I'd be lying if I agree to it. At the same time, I feel like I do have to get baptised, and getting baptised elsewhere is kinda off the table in my current situation.

I'm not looking for anyone to solve my situation, but 1. you can pray for me 2. similar experiences? 3. if you do have advice or opinions, do share.

I'm non-binary and my starting point is that I have a deep-ish femme voice but have always spoken in varying voices depending on mood, situation etc, but whenever I take my voice deeper (as in resonance I guess) my throat becomes strained very quickly. ^(I don't even like my voice right now because I can't find a balance between not sounding like a woman or man.) What can I do to prevent my throat from immediately becoming stiff and sore X,) ? I don't wanna get hurt

I also speak with a LOT of vocal fry, idk if that is something that matters

I was raised christian (baptist) and I think I started truly believing around 13. Around the time when I met a trans person of my age around 11-12 years old, I started going by a gender-neutral name and cut my hair short, and although I don't remember much of that time due to trauma I remember I had a lot of dysphoria and presented male for a time, but I have been trying to convince myself I'm fully just female this entire time, and trying to just come to terms with the fact that I'll never be with anyone because I don't want to marry a man. Recently though I realized the bible isn't against homosexuality as we see it today and doesn't really talk about trans people ever.

I have a hard time wrapping my head around a biblical view of gender after all this. I know gender is a social construct, but does the bible allow us to "bend" this construct? Can a person "be female/male/non-binary/etc on the inside" if these are made-up concepts and not something that exists ontologically in a person?

The way I feel about my gender is that I wish I didn't have one. I want to cross the rules of society and express myself in ways that aren't inside any box.

But all these concepts make my head spin. I can understand the feeling of knowing you're a woman/man despite not having the "right genitals" or chromosomes or whatever, but I don't really feel like I'm anything in particular, but also like, when God created man and woman he didn't create societal roles, he created two sexes, right? So am I a woman because of my sex? Would it be silly to be called a man if I don't physically match that nor would I present and behave in the male role in society?

I guess I don't really have an internal sense of gender, except I kinda do but it's not complete? And to me gender just seems to be about performing a role, and I don't quite understand how a person's internal sense of gender fits into it all.

Or like, while I'm not denying the existence of such people, and I do in a sense understand it, in another sense I don't understand how someone can be ftm/transmasc and present like a woman. That's why I'm asking, because I don't fully understand gender as a concept.

I also feel like being referred to as a man would be nice, but I don't understand how a person can be "male on the inside" if sex refers to biology and gender to social aspects. That's the gist of it.

Can someone talk about how they view gender in the light of the bible as a trans person?