u/Elgardner14

I've always loved gardening, houseplants, orchids, etc, and have recently become very interested in the growing popularity of tropicals/aroids. Of course, like many, I had brief dreams of buying, propagating, and selling ultra rare plants as a side gig that I just happened to love. Well, I think I've decided the market is pretty saturated with people who have been at this for years and have many more resources and have decided to simply collect for myself. I can't find the post here, but I think it was a collector's Polynesian Sunset Philodendrum (from what I could find on google) that blew my mind, and steered me back in the direction of buying what makes me eyes and heart happy, instead of what will make me money. There are so many varieties I never knew existed, and I'm hoping for some inspiration from your worthy photos. Also, if you don't have pics but you know it's a beauty, I'm happy for plant names to be listed, too.

So, newish rider and I have a good full-face helmet, not top of the line, but a good one. It hinders me from wanting to ride in the heat, long periods, and even taking it off at breaks because it's a pain to squeeze my noggin back in. Yes, it is my proper size per multiple associates assessments and fittings. I just don't love it. Looked at Shoei and Arai and like them both. There are things I like and dislike about both. I want pinlock avability, MIPS placement or better, ability to swap to transitioning visor (bc the ones that have the drop-down visor have a lower safety rating) and I want it to not feel like it's squeezing my eyeballs out when it's on. I would like to find one with the highest safety rating, regardless of the brand. Please shout-out your favorite helmets and why. Pics welcomed.

I've found a few posts but nothing quite the same as what I'm feeling. Yes, I am talking about anxiety but I am also talking about being a new rider and the feelings it's bringing up for me pertaining to being new at this, which is the heart of this post. I've read several similar posts, some from people without anxiety, so I believe many others experience some of what I'm feeling without blaming this ALL on anxiety. I do have anxiety and panic disorder, and getting licensed for the first time at the age of 50, was a huge accomplishment for me. I LOVE riding when I'm riding, but the anxiety that builds before I ride is limiting the time I ride. I read from most that you have to keep riding to be able to overcome and manage the nerves, but I also remember the instructors saying not to ride if you're not in the right frame of mind, for any reason. I'll add, that despite anxiety, I have a love of things like insane roller coasters, repelling, sky diving, etc., but I am also hypervigilant to safety. I'm a cautious and selective adrenaline junkie 😆. Being a former EMT also continues to fill my mind with past incidents that increase my vigilance to the potential risks. I am safely able to operate my bike but continue to feel more anxiety of the possibility of injury or death, while riding, and understand that can be totally the fault of another individual. I get so mad at myself that I can't just throw my gear on and go ride without going through a million self peptalks and still be filled with doubt. I want to ride my new bike and have so many places I want to go on it, but I'm already considering trading it for 3 wheels. I felt way more comfortable operating my smaller rebel 300, yet I felt unsafe bc of how light the bike was, and felt I needed a little more weight to the bike to feel safer on highways. Now I feel less nimble and more afraid of dropping and messing up my 1100T. I've low, or no-speed dropped 3 times in the last 2 seasons and it makes me feel so embarrassed and doubtful. My little 300, I felt I could whip around on and felt like it was part of me. I was getting so comfy I was thinking about trying the track/dirt bikes where I could get even more confident. I don't feel as connected to my 1100 and think I'm very preoccupied about messing up the bike. I'm stuck. I'm upset at my nerves and preoccupation with what could potentially happen. I can't even explain what happened during my drops because they happened so quickly (even at a standstill). As I grow older, I can't stop thinking that I'm taking an unnecessary risk by riding and that I'm being selfish or irresponsible by making the choice to ride, and putting my life in the hands of other drivers. Anxiety will always be a part of me. I actually went through the rider course and then followed it up with private lessons that helped tremendously, to help with the doubt (and skill of course). At what point does one decide that no matter how much they want to or enjoy the riding, the nerves will be too much of a risk and that maybe looking into getting 3 wheels, or stopping completely is the best option? I'm not afraid of the open air or speed. I did have elevated anxiety on my smaller bike too, at first, that almost spontaneously disappeared after more riding, but I didn't feel totally safe bc it was too light and I felt too exposed. Now I feel limited by my slightly heavier bike, even though that's what I thought would help. Is one of the main problems that I shouldn't have upgraded so soon? It's a small, lighter touring bike compared to many others. I know there is a lot here, but any personal experiences and advice, even if it's "Time to let go of riding" is welcomed. BTW, I'm 5'2, with extra short legs. Riding Rebel 1100T. Licensed in Oct of 24. Live in cold weather state so long breaks have kept my ride time limited and I know that doesn't help. Please understand that yes, there will always be anxiety for me, but this is about how I feel as a new rider and how to navigate those thoughts and feelings that I'm seeing other people without anxiety, struggling with also. PS I mention this bc my last post I deleted, had a comment that this is not a motorcycle issue but a mental health issue and I think it's a little off both (but mostly a new rider who happens to have anxiety issue). Thanks for taking the time to read all of this.

I've found a few posts but nothing quite the same as what I'm feeling. I have terrible anxiety and panic disorder, and getting licensed for the first time at the age of 50, was a huge accomplishment for me. I LOVE riding when I'm riding, but the anxiety that builds before I ride is limiting the time I ride. I read from most that you have to keep riding to be able to overcome and manage the anxiety, but I also remember the instructors saying not to ride if you're not in the right frame of mind. I am safely able to operate my bike but continue to feel more anxiety of the possibility of severe injury or death, while riding, and understand that can be totally the fault of another individual. I get so mad at myself that I can't just throw my gear on and go ride without going through a million self peptalks and still be filled with doubt. I want to ride my new bike and have so many places I want to go on it, but I'm already considering trading it for 3 wheels. I felt way more comfortable operating my smaller rebel, yet I felt unsafe bc of how light the bike was, and felt I needed a little more weight to the bike to feel safer on highways. Now I feel less nimble and more afraid of dropping and messing up my 1100T. I've low, or no-speed dropped 3 times in the last 2 seasons and it makes me feel so embarrassed and doubtful. My little 300, I felt I could whip around on and felt like it was part of me. I don't feel as connected to my 1100 and think I'm very preoccupied about messing up the bike. I'm stuck. I'm upset at my anxiety. I can't even explain what happened during my drops because they happened so quickly. As I grow older, I can't stop thinking that I'm taking an unnecessary risk by riding and that I'm being selfish or irresponsible by making the choice to ride, and putting my life in the hands of other drivers. Anxiety will always be a part of me. I actually went through the rider course and then followed it up with private lessons that helped tremendously, to help with the anxiety (and skill of course). At what point does one decide that no matter how much they want to or enjoy the riding, the anxiety will be too much of a risk and that maybe I need to get 3 wheels, or stop completely? I'm not afraid of the open air. I did have elevated anxiety on my smaller bike that almost spontaneously disappeared after more riding, but I didn't feel totally safe bc it was too light and I felt too exposed. Now I feel limited by my slightly heavier bike, even though that's what I thought would help. I know there is a lot here, but any personal experiences and advice, even if it's "Time to let go of riding" is welcomed. BTW, I'm 5'2, with extra short legs. Riding Rebel 1100T. Licensed in Oct of 24. Live in cold weather state so long breaks have kept my ride time limited and I know that doesn't help.