u/Emotional_Assist_415

Ok so I'm going to post this for transparency just to hopefully resonate with others here too. So I haven't had any kratom in 496 days. Super excited for Sunday being 500 days that's huge. I have a huge work commitment on Friday, like crazy huge, and I was all set to get some norcos today to get through it. I got 10 of them on Sunday but those are now gone and I was set to get the rest tomorrow but the guy just cancelled. One of those situations where now I cannot afford to be mini-detoxing for this thing on Friday. So had the legitimate thought to get a couple 7oh pills to get through this. I'm posting this for accountability because I would just hate myself to throw away 500 days of sobriety but the other part of my brain knows how bad this can go if I'm kinda coming down. So, I don't necessarily need any encouragement, I'm 99% sure I'm going to abstain but I just wanted everyone to kind of see the pull that this stuff still has 500 days in - I still think of it as an option when things get really dire, and they are dire right now.

Anyway. I'll update on here tomorrow and let everyone know how it went. I'm sure i'll be fine.

There's a whole lot of poor reviews, I don't understand that at all. Makes me so happy I played it without seeing anything about it online first.

Sure hope nintendo doesn't base their decisions on making future brothership games based on the vocal minority from youtube

From all kratom.

I can't do this anymore with my relapsing friend, this is bullshit. He said he's tapered down to a lower daily mg now but I fully expect that number to increase and fluctuate for another year or however long.

I had some major major shit happen at work Friday and I can't even talk to him about it cuz his heads in the clouds still. This is like future altering type of disciplinary shit that is going to change me one way or another and he's just too consumed by his own shit to even bother to care about anyone him....which that's what this drug does to you it's too taxing on the body and mind it takes over and makes you only care about yourself.

I think this is enough reasons to sever the friendship now? As in - it might be good for both of us if I say something officially like that to him. It's been almost a year and a half of me getting clean and him lip servicing me saying he's gonna work on it, this weekend for sure, etc. A people pleaser that wants to tell people what he thinks they want to hear, even if he has no intention of following through, got old real quick. I can't tell you how many times I had altered plans, got a babysitter, went to our weekly location to meet just for him to flake after telling me he'd be there a couple hours earlier.

I just don't have time for this anymore you know?

Reminds me of that Pinocchio scenario they would talk about in psychology classes - where pinocchio(they relate him to the drug addict), leaves his family and wants to see what the world is all about and test it himself and all the bad people surround him then he goes off to pleasure island for awhile until he finally sees what starts happening to everyone around him and realizes oh no, I better get back home, but by the time he gets back home, home isn't the same thing it used to be, his home isn't there, and it's not there because geopedo obviously went to go look for him, but it's not there because of the choices that Pinocchio made. Kind of a self realization thing about the impact a drug addict moving back in with his parents(or trying to return sober to a friend), has to face and understand - that the relationship is permanently scarred because of the selfish choices we make while on drugs.