u/EmploymentSpecific26

you tell yourself you will forgive her. that you can let it go.

but in the future there will be fights, and in the back of your mind you will remember "you cheated and disrespected me so i am not going to respect your bullshit opinion on this matter"

and it totally erodes things. You just have to not give a fuck that it happened which is next to impossible for me personally. Suppressing doesn't working. Talking about it for hours doesn't work. Once it happens, it breaks you and just turns into a disease that stagnates and destroys healthy boundaries and reconcilation behaviors in future disagreements

So back in 2022-2023 (age 32-33) I was over-employed working 2 jobs. I got fired from one for reasons unrelated to OE, so I changed my LinkedIn (which was deactivated originally) to say I was only working at the 2nd job for the past year. HR of the first job that fired me saw the update on LinkedIn, contacted the company I was still working for, and I was fired from my 2nd job just a day after my first job fired me for being OE.

Fast forward 3 years to present day (age 36-37), I’m living abroad in Europe. I just arrived to and started a new job for a big name, dream job.

Turns out someone from the first company that fired me from 3 years ago recognized me in the office halls - my old lead/boss - 3 years later, on the other side of the world. He just happened to be working at the current company. I had no idea initially and stayed out of his way when I saw him in the office area.

He reported me to HR for being a bad egg in the past and that I was not trustworthy / lacked integrity. HR did their investigation, confirmed I was OE in the past, that I had lied on my resume for not putting all my work experience and fudging some dates from 3 years to make it look like I just worked for one company, and fired me for not being trustworthy.

This was in my first month which falls under a probationary period. Employee and employer can let you go without any reason or notice period in this time.

Now i’m abroad, still at the company apartment they gave me to stay in while looking for a new apartment in a new city (I have to vacate by the end of next week), with my European residence permit no longer valid since I’m not with the company that sponsored me (or at least it will be in 2-3 months if I don’t find a new job in this EU country), trying to find a way home fast, with nothing to go back to other than my parents place in California, since all my stuff was sold, put into storage, etc when I moved abroad for this company.

Sometimes your decisions from the past can really screw your present. But what can you do but move forward :)