u/Equivalent-Side-5723

So my step dad tu* all the time like even when hes not sick,he will like have a headache and it will make him do it and he does it VERY loud and my room is next to the bathroom. For the past few months i am not able to sleep because he is usually awake during the night and everytime i hear him walk or cough or anything i get so scared that he will do it. Its 5:30 am rn and i haven't slept at all and i keep focusing on the sounds around me and idk what to do

He knows about my emet but he doesn't care and he thinks its stupid,he never said it but i know he does becouse of his behavioe and he would sometimes gag on purpose to scare me he doesn't do rhat abymore but yk.. I know he cant control it but i dont think it has to be that loud because its like crazy loud..

I know that i cant get rid of the fear of the sounds but i js want to be able to sleep normally

I am very young,im 16 and ive been struggling a lot with my past and i need to fix this problem becuse its literally consuming me.

Growing up wasnt easy for me and im not going to talk about that i just want to say that i didnt have any role models or anyone to tell me whats okay to do and whats not. When i was 12 i started smoking and drinking and i had much older friends,i was hanging out around dangerous places and i didnt see any problems with my behaviour. I did a lot of things that no child my age should do and the regrets of my actions are killing me inside. when i was 13 it stopped becouse something very bad happened to me and i relized that i need to change and i really did.

its very hard to parent yourself,and im really proud of myself for making changes i did and im happy with how far ive got but a lot of people still see me as the person i was before. I cant do anything about that and i dont really care about what those people think about me but things they say about me are kinda influencing other peoples opinions on me and it sucks becouse i cant find friends.

im tired of letting people walk over me just becouse i did bad stuff 3,4 years ago plus most stuff i did was only bad for me and my reputation,i never really hurt anyone ever on purpose. I went no contact with all my friends becouse they would still mention things from the past and they still see me as the 13 yo me.

i do have a boyfriend and we are together for a long time and everythig is great but im scared that he will hear those things about me and that it will change the way he sees me. He did hear some stuff and we talked about it and i said whats true and whats not and he was okay with that but theres more and it makes me scared.

I used to lie a lot for attention becouse all my friends were much older then me so i wanted to seem cool but i didnt relize that those things are disgusting to do so now somepeople do belive that i did those things becouse i said thst i did.

i cant sleep or eat becouse of the shame and regrets that sre eating me alive. I cant be alone becouse the second im alone with my thoughts i start thinking about all of this and i have to move out and live alone in little less then 2 years so really need to find some self love and fix issues i have

I don't have any diagnosis but I've been struggling with sleep for months and i didnt know where else to ask for help and advice

No matter how tired i get i can't sleep even if i pull an all nighter i still don't feel tired when i lay down. I feel tired all the time but I just cant fall asleep and when i finally do i wake up every two hours and i barely sleep. I dont even do anything when im awake i dont use my phone or anything i just lay in bed and my mind is blank idk how to explain

Does anyone have any advice? pls im so tired of this and idk what to do

ffor the past month i have this weird uncomfortable feeling in my lower left side of my stomach and idk why and its freaking me out becouse its kinda getting worse now,somwtimes it hurts a lot and also whenever i eat and while im eating i feel very n* and also everytime i do something phisically(even just walking ) i get dizzy and n* and i feel really weak .its not that bad because nothing happened but iim starting to be really scared that it willl...Does anybody know what it could be and what can i do to make it stop?

i also had the same problem months ago but my stomach hurt so bad i coulnd even stand ,i went to the doctors and they said its nothing but idk im scared

Talking about this fear i have irl was so scary but i finnaly had the courage to speak up so i did and my mom is supportive and wants to help so thats good

Ive been to therapy before just not for this so i am a little nervous how its gonna go but i genuenly dont want to get worse then this so im gonna do it even if im scared

even if i got worse i still see this as a positive thing becouse that made me want to get help

Every time i go outside anywhere i get really n* and i get a pretty baad headache and ive been trying to not go out but i can't avoid this feeling and im really really scared that it might happen when im outside and that makes me even more terrified of going out which is already scary and im just like tired of this i dont want to live this way anymore. I feel like this fear is everything i am and that everything i do has to do something with it and no Matter how much i try i can't get better abd im slowly loosing hope that it willget better in the future idk

Its been pretty bad with this feeling like im sick ,i cant sleep,i cant eat i can barely move becouse im not eating and my head hurts like hell and everytime i swallow even my spit it feela like it will happen but it never does

the thought of eating makes me gag but if i dont eat i get bad nausea ,most likely becouse of heat and im also on mz period so its worse. I havent eaten in a while and i reallz should but idk what and when and im a little scared

Im home alone so i dont know what to do and its also 5 am i cant call my mom or anything i cant sleep

i wouldnt call myself the biggest fan but i really love star trek and some times i feel left out becouse i dont know every sigle thing about it but i am always watching new things i mean there is so much series and i need some time to finish it alll yk

sorry my englissh sucks its not my first language

Its two in the morning and i just heard my dad do it and im so scared even tho he probably did it because he is drunk im very scared Nd i already felt sick myself and i can go anywhere right now i want to go ro mymoms house but i can only do that in the morning and i wont be able to sleep becouse i am very very scared and the sound of it really triggered me and im acared that it will happen again so i have to be covering my ears the whole night I'm barely typing this becouse of it and im also scared of going out in the morning becouse i would have to go pass him im so lost and i dont know what to do i never had a panic attack this bad and i feel completely stuck and acared and alone

I didnt eat for a while because i literally dont have any food at my house and i have no money and i feel very nauseous becouse of it and i think i just need to eat but i cant and i also dont have any drinking water and im very scared and i cant sleep because my stomach hurts and i dont know what to do

So i had a really bad stomach ache like three weeks ago and it lasted two weeks i went to the doctors and nothing was wrong with me and i wasnt sick or anything my stomach just hurt pretty bad all the time and since then ive been terrified to go anywhere becouse i think that something bad is gonna happen and that im gona get sick and yk

And even tho weeks passed im still scared and rn im in a bus(very scary for me) going to my boyfriend's House to stay for the weekend and im scared that i will be thinking about getting sick and will ruin everything becouse of it

I dont know how to get past this constant fear of doing anything outside my house

every saturday i have lunch with my dad at my grandmas. I am very picky when it comes to food and one of my main safe foods is rice. My grandma made like some chicken that i didnt really eat and i was only eating rice like a lot of it and then i noticed little black things in it and im pretty sure that they were bugs and i am very scared of bugs and getting sick so this is like my two worst fears combining.. Also for the past month ive been having stomach problems and doctors dont know why so i am very scared that i will throw up eventually. I havent been eating much becouse im balls terrified that i will get sick and rice is the only food that i can eat enytime and now after this i will probably be scared to eat rice again becouse i will think of bugs everytime i do. I am starting to be really scared of going outside becouse im scared that i will pick up a virus somewhere or that i will see someone throwing up or that i will get sick and im not home but i have to go back to school next week which means that i have to go out every day and im so scared.

i literaly have no one to talk to,i have no friends,i do have a boyfriend but im way too scared to tell him about my fears. I am trying my best to hide the fact that this phobia is literally ruining my life but i dont think i can do it anymore. Ive been crying for the past hour becouse i cant live my life normally because of my stupid fears that literaly consume my whoel being. I will probably stop eating again cuz of this and i dont want to do that i dont want to ruin my health. im so lost and scared and i dont know what to do about all of this i dont wanna feel this way anymore. This is my first time talking about it and i feel so stupid about posting this but i didnt know what else to do