u/Euphoric-Object-1108

I've posted like 3 posts already. Seeing my gallery slowly grow without any new pics of him hurts me more than anything.. I loved taking photos of him everyday and sharing them with everyone.. I miss my routines with him, I miss watching him do his stupid little stuff, seeing his favorite food knowing he can't appreciate it anymore, seeing everything I bought for him just staying there unused hurts me so so so damn bad. Its all I can talk about to anyone, I know most people are probably over that by now I just ruin everyone's mood and people have to think of something to tell me. I just want my baby back for fucks sake it's all I need!!! Pirin my baby i miss you more than anything I'm so sorry for everything I could've done to hurt you. Its so unfair that you're dead and I'm still alive, I would give my life for yours, but I know that no one could ever give you the treatment you deserve.

When he was alive I was working hard to be a better friend, do good at school, I wanted to become a web designer but now what he's gone I just dojt care. I dont care about this stupid school, I dont care about my friendships they're all stupid surface level friendships anyway, I dont care what I end up doing with my life, damn the only thing stopping me from going back to drugs is that I promised my baby I won't do it. Pirin I miss you. I've ordered a custom keychain of him, it looks just like him. This, and everything relating to him, is the only thing I care about. He passed may 17th. I didn't cry that much the first few days but I got hit with it today. I realized how much more lethargic I've become. I dont want anything but my baby back. I miss you Pirin, I miss u so much.

I know most people don't see fish as that important but I was so attached to my baby. I would give him a kiss goodnight every single night. He had organ failure, and I couldn't treat it. I attempted to treat it once, it worked for a while but it just came back. I burried him in a little plant i chose, it's yellow like him. His name was Pirin. He was the most beautiful fish ever man.. he was also so sweet, he'd bite everything he saw for the first time. It still hasn't hit me. I'm trying to distract myself I feel guilty, maybe if I tried harder he could've survived. He wasn't as responsive as before, but he would still greet me like aways. He was so tiny and sweet. I feel so guilty. I wish I could speak to him somehow. RIP to the sweetest baby. I will miss you Pirin.

As the title says, my betta has dropsy again. About like a month ago he had it and he managed to survive with medications, but he has it again.. is it worth it to attempt to stop the dropsy again? Or will it just end up in us delaying his passing?