Am I overreacting or is this "parentification" normal?
For context I'm 18 and currently taking a gap year due to depression and anxiety. I have two siblings F(15) and M(10) for as long as I can remember I've been their second mom. I'd change my brother's diapers, do their laundry and clean their rooms.
I do most of the house chores. I clean the kitchen, do the dishes, clean the bedrooms and bathrooms as well as the living room and the yard. And I prepare my siblings for school and cook breakfast, lunch and dinner for everyone everyday.
When I was in high-school I'd come back home around 7pm and on days my mom wasn't home I'd have to cook dinner and go buy the relish to cook it (vegetables are bought everyday). I don't complain because my dad hasn't kicked me out yet, he's been telling me he'd kick me out since I was 13 (which is understandably my fault I've struggled with depression since 12)
My father can't cook or clean. He quit his job a year ago and he's been home since then. He can also be verbally abusive sometimes.
The issue today is that dinner has to be prepared before 8.30 pm or else everyone complains that I'm taking too long. I was feeling very overwhelmed today and I asked my sister to help me cut the vegetables but she refused and said I don't do anything so why can't I just cut. I got upset because I do do everything I told her I clean and cook and prepare her and my brother for school and she said I'm still home most of the day.
Now I'm wondering if I'm being unreasonable and I'm complaining too much (to myself that is) I understand that it's my responsibility as the eldest and I don't do anything but I wish they could help.
I clean after all of them except my mum. I help with laundry, I pick their food wrappers and I'm just tired. My whole life my existence I feel has only been to serve them. Am I overreacting? Or is this just a normal eldest daughter thing?