Winter is coming stay strong or idk
been going through this disease for like 2 years now its getting worse every year last year I had month or two symptoms free in summers but this year I could feel everything everyday tho i don’t have that palm and foot itching which happens in slight increase of temp. I did enjoyed the summers when out on running, did some trips the pain was 4-5 mins max and then i was free like a bird. From last week the temp has dropped in india it’s starting to rain, i started a side business aswell I cook and stuff it’s starting to get pretty uncomfortable to do that I have night job too. I was always a dreamer but lately I’m getting scared. Seeing people going through years scares me this winter scared me..i don’t know how am going to do what I wanna do. I don’t come from rich family I have lot of responsibilities and pressures.
Its stupid, I have started smoking drinking I don’t wanna die but i feel if life is going to like having it smaller is good. I do have a idea how i develop this thing I was going at a very bad phase in life, anxiety attacks and all. I can’t date anyone anymore aswell last i dated was 10years ago..I realised that with all this things i get dependent on a person very easily, i no longer have a sense of true feeling that’s why I avoid people and sharing. I have seen many people walk away from me or changed and I know i won’t be able to take that as that ease and comfort like this is unreal dream for me, I can’t be dependent to anyone.
I have tried all oral medicine, immune suppresser but nothing helps. Xolair and rhapsido thing is not available in india under insurance and paying this much for whole life is not possible lmao.
It’s not about the disease anymore, it’s just feel useless, lost, sad about everything anymore idc.
I hate weekends too….