u/FedeVia1

I'm reading Suburra by Bonini and De Cataldo (really recommend the Netflix series btw, one of the best productions of my country in recent years). It's a noir/thriller about 2011 Rome, where organized crime, politics and Church intertwine.

I went to read some reviews about it, and so many English-speaking (or writing) commenters went on and on about excessive swearing. I'm so baffled by this, unsure on what people expect? I've seen Pulp fiction and the like, so it's not like American gangsters don't use foul language lmao.

The funny thing here is that the novel actually depicts quite accurately our dialect. Swearing is a punctuation mark and a tool for emphasis so outside workplaces nobody really bats an eye. Street thugs, politicians and elite all swear behind closed doors just the same.

Is this because international media has created this myth of the gentleman mobster?

My son is 22 months, he's not particularly clingy more has stranger danger. He has some parental preference for my husband, but nothing that translates into tantrums if he doesn't get his way.

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My mom has him, in my flat, one afternoon a week. I'm addition to this we have lunch together every other weekend for a few hours. My MIL also babysits him, either with us in the flat or at her house, once a week most weeks.

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For two months now, my son absolutely refuses my mother. Cries, he doesn't want to let go, tantrums and screams. I trust my mother completely and know there is nothing negative going on, except that she gets visibly stressed and upset and tends to give him back to me after he cries for awhile. My solution has been thus far to just leave the house for the duration of the visit, or to leave him at her house (which is inconvenient for us as it's a bit far), but she says he cries for us intermittently, on Sunday she even texted me "when are you coming back" an hour before the time I had STATED I would come back.

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He does nothing of the sort with MIL. He goes to her happy as a clam, we leave and we hear him asking mom? dad? a couple of times and then gets back to play.

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I have two theories on why this is happening: my MIL worships my son, completely zeroes on him and kinda "bullies" him into giving her all the attention. This is super duper annoying to me but it actually works with LO I guess. My mother instead treats him as part of the family and doesn't give undivided attention if someone else is present.

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Another factor is the anxiety I mentioned. The problem is that she doesn't acknowledge it and actually blasted the other day how she's resilient and can keep going with him screaming. Lady, you broke in my bathroom while I was showering because you couldn't stand it long enough!

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The last factor is that my mother is from another country and has decided that it's her mission to speak that language my LO. That's amazing, but he is in a language explosion phase and I feel like that contributes him to feel unsafe in a way? As I'm not sure how much he understands her?

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I have no clue on how to coach her and help with this situation, especially since she's convinced that he's just super attached to us and does this with everyone. I want to stress that I don't really need her to babysit, she wants to do it but then complains that it's hard.

My son is 22 months, he's not particularly clingy nor has stranger danger. He has some parental preference for my husband, but nothing that translates into tantrums if he doesn't get his way.

My mom has him, in my flat, one afternoon a week. In addition to this we have lunch together every other weekend for a few hours. My MIL also babysits him, either with us in the flat or at her house, once a week most weeks.

For two months now, my son absolutely refuses my mother. Cries, he doesn't want to let go, tantrums and screams. I trust my mother completely and know there is nothing negative going on, except that she gets visibly stressed and upset and tends to give him back to me after he cries for awhile. My solution has been thus far to just leave the house for the duration of the visit, or to leave him at her house (which is inconvenient for us as it's a bit far), but she says he cries for us intermittently, on Sunday she even texted me "when are you coming back" an hour before the time I had STATED I would come back.

He does nothing of the sort with MIL. He goes to her happy as a clam, we leave and we hear him asking mom? dad? a couple of times and then gets back to play.

I have two theories on why this is happening: my MIL worships my son, completely zeroes on him and kinda "bullies" him into giving her all the attention. This is super duper annoying to me but it actually works with LO I guess. My mother instead treats him as part of the family and doesn't give undivided attention if someone else is present.

Another factor is the anxiety I mentioned. The problem is that she doesn't acknowledge it and actually boasted the other day how she's resilient and can keep going with him screaming. Lady, you broke in my bathroom while I was showering because you couldn't stand it long enough!

The last factor is that my mother is from another country and has decided that it's her mission to speak that language my LO. That's amazing, but he is in a language explosion phase and I feel like that contributes him to feel unsafe in a way? As I'm not sure how much he understands her?

I have no clue on how to coach her and help with this situation, especially since she's convinced that he's just super attached to us and does this with everyone. I want to stress that I don't really need her to babysit, she wants to do it but then complains that it's hard.