u/Firm_Flamingo5073

This was so scary to do. So first of all, I am proud of me for doing it.

Today, my therapist told me that people who have experienced complex trauma for so long, like me, get addicted to the stress and pain almost like someone who is using drugs. He told me that it makes sense why I do not understand why I do it, and why I do it when the world feels calm.

He told me that it's the chemicals in my brain. And he told me it's not my fault. He said "it's not your fault."

It feels really comforting, but not real.

I guess I just want to know your thoughts on this? Is that a real thing?

Hey all. Its been about 3 weeks since the last time I self harmed, and I want to so often. I finally talked to my therapist about it who recommended replacing it with going to the gym. That's fine.

But what about late at night, or when I'm at work, or in most any scenario of the day where I cannot drop everything to work out?

I need help coming up with ideas to replace it.

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Hi, sorry to post this on here, I'm just not sure who else to talk to about this.

I think I might have bipolar II - I believe my therapist thinks this as well - and the point of this post is not to diagnose me, so I'll leave that there.

Next session I have the ability to ask him if I have bipolar. This is similar to how I got my ADHD diagnosis which made me feel some grief for my brain, but so so validated and so many things made sense. I'm wondering if this would do the same for me; if it would make me feel validated and less insane.

My therapist doesn't really like labels. And I do NOT want an on-paper diagnosis because I do not plan on starting a new medication anytime soon, so there's no point in having it on paper. He told me that he had words to label my experience, but to think about it because the "treatment would be the same" knowing what he knows. To me, this feels like going to the doctor for a cold vs. covid and saying both are treated with ibuprofen, so why know which one you have? (Not exactly the same, I know)

But even if he tells me that I do, I wonder what I'd even do with that information. There's not many people to tell, not that I'd want to share, but it could be a good way to help explain. Even then, would I want to explain with that label? Or would I just say I experience lows and not so lows, haha.

Part of me really wants answers, but part of me wants to leave it at symptoms - I am hoping for some advice, I feel at a loss with what to do.