Am I demi ? Cupioromantic ?? Idk ?
Hi. I'm 18F and I know I'm on the aro spectrum, but I don't know exactly where I fall, and it's driving me a little crazy.
So, a few years ago, I had a guy friend I talked to a lot for a few months. My friends were shipping us, and I kept saying no. But looking back, I think I might have had a small crush on him? That was three years ago, so I'm not sure. Anyway, a bit after that, I was in the hospital for five months and didn't see my friends much. In the middle of that, one of my friends started dating him. I didn't really care because I was busy dealing with hospital stuff.
Now I'm trying to figure out if I'm demiromantic or something else I only have two male friends: this guy, and another (gay) guy who's kind of annoying but I have a love-hate relationship with. I think maybe I'm cupioromantic? Or am I quoiromantic? I have social anxiety, so I don't try to meet new people, and I feel pretty stuck. I barely even talk to the two male friends I have.
A few months ago, someone from one of my classes messaged me and said he had a crush on me. I was kind of scared to write back ( first time chat😭) I didn't even talk to him before. I told him he could talk to me first, or that I'd like to know something about him before ? and like friends ....
I'm also ace. I've never kissed anyone (and honestly, I'm not sure I want to). Maybe I had that one tiny crush, but I'm not even sure about that. My social anxiety started about a year and a half to two years ago, but even before that, things felt weird.
I do want a relationship. Even more now, since my mom died and I feel alone all the time. I feel bad calling my friends, except for one, and she barely answer💔