r/religion

Does anyone have a question about islam? I am here to answer as much as I can

My boyfriend is Muslim and I am not. Going into this relationship 3 years ago knowing this, I wondered what the future would look like. It ended up transcribing into a lot of back and fourth.
At first I did not need to convert to Islam as long as I agreed our kids would be raised Muslim. Now I have to convert.
The bigger problem I’m facing is that I’m not sure my boyfriend even looks at me as an individual person. He expects to be obeyed, me be hospitable, and convert.
The bigger picture is that these were never things discussed when the relationship was getting serious. He finally cracked and laid out his honesty with me. He grew up programmed to believe he will find someone with the same views, marry and have a family. There was no emotionality involved. Fast forward to me- he fell in love for the first time ever. He never knew what love felt like nor did he think it was real. I grew up knowing love, care, affection, loyalty, compromise, etc. were the core foundational actions/feelings to have a successful marriage.
So now that we’re here, I’ve broken down and we’ve separated mostly because of our disagreements but also because I found out he was partaking in infedility while we were together.
Fun facts: I’ve never met 2/6 of his siblings (his eldest sisters) or his mother (father has passed), he holds me to a standard that he can not upkeep for himself (for ex. Partying, drinking, cheating), he has finally admitted he has never fully let me into his life because of his hesitancies regarding his religion (obviously our relationship is haram) and he says he “wants to feel like I will always listen, take Islam serious, etc.”
I’m kind of lost to be honest. Hypothetically speaking, if I met all of his “standards” I’m not sure he would ever stop the things that are deteriorating our relationship. Because of religion, he believes men and women are not equal and men are given unlimited forgiveness while women are not. To me, that sounds like he is allowed to live whatever type of life he’d like including lying, betrayal, etc. Which if this is the case, I cannot agree. I was not raised to allow a man a to get away with anything, to treat his wife as a caretaker, child birther and house maid. I was raised to know a marriage consists of compromise and two people doing what it takes to please the other.
I’ve tried to explain to him that his “religion” excuses are poor and his “culture” may be the real problem. I have learned enough to know that yes, Islam can be taken negatively but can also be appreciated and respected. Cultures are what tear apart the beauty in Islam and pick the things from the quaran to benefit (usually) the men.
At this point, I think I need to speak with a sheik to get the questions I have answered.

I realized my last poll was kind of screwy, so here's a better poll. And sorry about the last choice ... there can only be six options.

View Poll

I have to be so honest right now. I have been feeling this way for a long time. I grew up Christian. I went to a non-denominational church. I was very involved and loved what I believed in. I felt connected. Then I got married and took a couple years to become Catholic. I married a Catholic. But through that process I felt like something was wrong. I started questioning everything. These classes taught me so much but I started feeling like all of it wasn’t me. I was brought up as a Christian so of course I was going to believe what I knew. It was comfortable. Jesus was a man. And he rose again. Or so they say. He was the son of God. So many people have said that. I didn’t see him perform miracles. Maybe people claimed this. They so believed he was the son of God just like many of these cults. I’m sorry but I don’t know if I do. This is what I believe. There are so many different religions. Thousands. We all do not know until we are dead. And that is the truth. I am very spiritual. I believe when we die our loved ones stay with us for a while. I believe they have the freedom to come and go. I believe that maybe there’s a chance we can come back to live again if we choose or if God our creator chooses for us to come back. I still very much believe in God. I believe the Christian Bible was written by men for men. Based on values those men had long ago. I feel bad that I am going against everything I’m supposed to believe. Because it hurts the people I love the most. But this is how I feel.

As far as I can tell from my bit of research, only Christianity and Judaism use a standard sitting arrangement in their houses of worship. The other main ones like Islam, Hinduism, Sikhism, and Buddhism all sit on the floor. Some discussion questions ...

If you have tried both, which do you prefer?

Is there a scriptural or functional reason to sit this way? What is the history?

Is there a sitting arrangement, like gender separation, for example? Why is that?

Is there a time to stand, and a time to sit?

I’ve seen a bunch of these, and since people are starting to talk a lot about Islam so I thought I’ll make one. So of youre curious about the opinion of a Quranic Centric Muslim you can ask away. Obviously I don’t know everything but I’ll try answering the best I can.

I’m having a bit of posters block, and unsure what I can contribute.

What kind of posts do yall find interesting and want to see more of?

In your house of worship, what material is the floor made of? Is there a reason, or tradition for it? (In Hinduism the ancient temples are stone floors. In modern American ones, they can be tile or carpet. I have yet to enter a wood one, other than a repurposed old church, and cost was a factor. Are there designs on the floor?

Most older Christian churches I've been in for wedding or funerals are hardwood.

Along the same lines, are there designs on the ceiling?

Are you looking for suggestions of what religion suits your beliefs? Or maybe you're curious about joining a religion with certain qualities, but don't know if it exists? This is your opportunity for you to ask other users of this sub what religion might best fit you.

EDIT: Comments refresh on the beginning of each month. You can post your questions or concerns each month as needed.

Are you looking for suggestions of what religion suits your beliefs? Or maybe you're curious about joining a religion with certain qualities, but don't know if it exists? This is your opportunity for you to ask other users of this sub what religion might best fit you.

EDIT: Comments refresh on the beginning of each month. You can post your questions or concerns each month as needed.

First time here, and i'm not debating the existence of God at all, I just want to be critical. For context, i'm a Christian, and I see many similarities as to why people act the way they do and sin nature. I also see that people, religious or otherwise, choose to do good are empaths and compassionates, which mirrors what Jesus teaches about loving your fellow man.

However, i've been reading into Jiddu Krishnamurti and the points he's had that religion was made so man could have security from the unknown and be virtuous to strengthen the self speaks to a part of me that finds similarities to my perspective on God.

This is a matter of perspective, and so my ultimate question; did Jesus give us the values and commandments that many people identify by, (thou shalt not kill, steal, etc) even if when they're not Christians, or are these values innately manmade and Jesus was created as a symbol of these virtues by Man?

My faith in Jesus is strong, but I feel it's right that I ask these questions and examine myself so I don't become ignorant like many others. You don't have to believe in Jesus to give your opinion if you choose another religion. There's a strong tie between reality and religion, that much is clear. The question is, which one is the product of the other?