u/Fit-Plenty8777

Sent it through the app. Three words. Happy Mothers Day. That was it.

I'm not going to pretend the year wasn't what it was. We don't talk outside the app. We don't share anything that isn't logistics about the kids. There's no warmth there to fake. But she's still their mom. One day, my kids are going to be old enough to ask what kind of man their dad was on the days he had a reason not to be decent. I'd rather have the receipts of three words than silence. Some of you won't send anything today, and I get it. Some situations are too far past it. Mine isn't. So I sent the three words and put my phone down. That's the whole thing. No reply expected. No follow-up. Sent it because she's their mother, not because she's anything to me anymore.

Anyone else send the three words today.

Picked the kids up from school Friday. Started the weekend with our usual run. Costco first. Samples down every aisle. The $1.50 hot dog and drink that's been the same price longer than my kids have been alive. Chess pizza for $9.99, big enough we eat off it for two days. My son hands the receipt to the attendant on the way out, so she'll draw the smiley face on it. He loves that part. I do, too. We left in good spirits. All three of us.

Got to HEB. Grabbed a cart. My daughter started mapping the store the way she always does, lining up our list to the aisles. Then she stopped and said it out of nowhere. "She said Dad I love you and mom both, but I can't say I love you back in front of mom. " She said,' You know I do love you. " Very much. You're my dad. Then she hugged me right there in the produce section. My son was standing next to us. He said to me, too, dad. I held the tears back. I held them back through the rest of the list. Through the drive home. I held them back because if I cried, she'd think the love confession had hurt me when it was the most precious thing she's ever said.

What hurt wasn't the love. What hurt was the weight she's carrying to keep that love hidden. A nine year old shouldn't have to plan when she's allowed to tell her father she loves him. She shouldn't have to apologize for the words she can't say in front of one parent about the other one. I'll never forget standing in the middle of the produce section, the hug, and my son pressing in. The three of us in the middle of a grocery store doing the most important thing that happened to me all year.

If your kid has ever had to pull you aside to say something they can't say at home, you know what I mean. The love is real. The system around it is the problem. Not them. Not us. The grown-up war they're being asked to navigate.

I found a GPS tracker hidden in my daughter's backpack during a pickup. She was already upset before I even asked about it. I kept my voice calm, took it out, and just told her none of this was her fault and she didn't need to worry. What bothered me most wasn't even the tracker. It was realizing how much pressure kids can feel when they're stuck between two parents who don't get along. I focus hard on making my home the calm place where they don't feel interrogated or stressed. But situations like this test that.

Any other fathers dealt with this? How did you handle it without escalating or putting more weight on the kids? If you've dealt with this and want to talk through how I handled the documentation side, feel free to DM me.

I found a GPS tracker hidden in my daughter's backpack during a pickup. She was already upset before I even asked about it. I kept my voice calm, took it out, and just told her none of this was her fault and she didn't need to worry. What bothered me most wasn't even the tracker. It was realizing how much pressure kids can feel when they're stuck between two parents who don't get along.

I focus hard on making my home the calm place where they don't feel interrogated or stressed. But situations like this test that.

If you've dealt with this and want to talk through how I handled the documentation side, feel free to DM me.