u/Fluffy-Night-9715

Tell me a relationship with a (covert) narc wouldnt have worked out.

I left multiple times and they have a new one (been together for months, almost a year) but I am left ruminating if I did a mistake by leaving.

How come the new one does not see the real him?

Maybe I was the problem.

Please please help me.

How the relationship would have been like if I would have stayed?

The life with him was in many ways good. Everyone has their issues so did i make them bigger than they really were?

- monkey branching from a relationship to another
- difficulties being alone or just sit still (always out with friends, hobbies, on phone…)
- have admitted he can not ne alone (ie needs a woman)
- playing the victim all the time
-”ex cheated”
- guilt tripping me a lot
- love bombing
- hoovering me many times, even now when he is in a serious relationship
- felt like he had no empathy
- his needs were the most important (wanted us to live together very fast, spoke about family, kids, marriage very quickly and i was not ready so thus the pressure towards me)
- commenting my specific kind of clothes
- made me feel i am abnormal and thus went to therapy
- keeping in touch with other women if i break up with him
- very jealous of his sibling and friends
- had a very rough teenage
- emotions felt shallow, as if he was acting love and stuff
- can be very mean and cold if things do not go his way
- his familymember ”warned” me about him being difficult and how one of his ex cried to them due to his behaviour
- is very goal orientated and strong minded
- ”i would do x if you do y”
- despite this all, he is also nice and kind when things go his way

Advice needed :)

Is it true NPDs feel mostly resentment, anger etc and not happiness?