u/FrogsFlowersRain

hi! I will be getting married in a few years. Before the wedding, we’ll have a few traditional ceremonies. I love my boyfriend very much, and he’s Indian too. The only difference is that I was raised in the U.S. and he was raised in India, so we grew up with somewhat different experiences.
Lately, my parents and relatives have been giving me a long list of things I should and shouldn’t do during these ceremonies like how to act, where to sit, what traditions to follow, and even small superstitious things. A lot of it seems to come down to, “If you don’t do it, people will talk badly about you.”
The thing is, I genuinely don’t care what random people think. It’s my day and I want to look back at it and remember that I had fun and got to celebrate with the people I love. Of course I’m going to be respectful of my culture, my family, and the traditions that are meaningful. I’m not trying to offend anyone or refuse every tradition.
I just don’t understand why I feel like I have to perform a certain version of myself to avoid gossip. I don’t want to spend my own wedding ceremonies worrying about whether I’m standing the “right” way or whether some auntie is judging me.
Has anyone else struggled with balancing Indian wedding traditions and simply being yourself? How did you set boundaries with family while still being respectful?

My 12 week maltipoo ive had for a week now never takes any naps. We started to make her a nap room and put her in the crate for her to sleep. She runs out of the crate and tries to escape the room everytime we put her in there for an hour. After we close the crate and we leave, she cries for 1-3 minutes much less then before and then she quiets down. She used to go in with her favorite toys and treats in the start but now but she never stays in her crate unless we close and force her in there to nap.
I feel bad and scared she’s hating the crate and room. Aaaaa idk what to do. Should I be taking the crate out of the nap room sometimes to play outside with it and make her feel like the crate isn’t always going to mean we will leave her. I don’t know if this also means I’m making her have separation anxiety.
I’m stressin out. Idk if I’m doing this right at all.