u/Frost_Blue_182 — reddlx

Bye April, for now 💕

I'm taking a break from Finch.

A lot of posts like this go under venting but I don't feel disgruntled with the app or anything like that. I just feel I have gotten what I can from it and currently find things easier to "do". Checking in and ticking things off has become more of a chore in itself.

I also have been trying to stay off my phone and avoid even picking it up (and been fairly successfully in doing so) which has been making Finch more of a hindrance for me because I need to pick up and use my phone for it.

Nonetheless, I want to thank Finch, my tree friends and my little April for helping me get to this point. I probably will be back to it some point, but when I started using it, I was stuck in a rut and now, I am still in a rut but I don't feel stuck anymore. This is kind of the point in the app to be fair, so I'm glad it worked for me.

u/Frost_Blue_182 — 21 days ago

▲ 3 r/BPD

How do you avoid symptomatic relapse?

Before I start, I just want to note relapse isn't specifically for self harm or suicidal thoughts and tendencies, but also symptoms that are becoming difficult to manage again like splitting or impulsive behaviours.

I also hope this isn't taken the wrong way but because of where I was getting to with my recovery and patterns I am noticing, I would be looking for advice from people who have been in a similar position to me.

So I've went through DBT therapy, which was really helpful, and I also had a medication change just over a year ago (mirtazapine to trazodone). I also have PCOS and began treatment for this in 2023.

The therapy has been helpful for providing me with tools and resources I can turn to for processing things. It's been really valuable although it's quite difficult fitting it into my daily life at times. That old "not enough hours in the day" thing.

My medication was changed because the mirtazapine was having a detrimental effect on my physical health. I felt I was wearing weights on my limbs all the time and my weight went up to the heaviest I have ever been. I was sleeping a lot. I also described myself as "too zonked for even thinking of therapy". So I changed to trazodone. The weight is coming off, diabetes is pretty much in remission, I can run 5k, it's been life changing on that front. However, I also have the energy to live with my BPD symptoms now when they play up. I kid you not, I'd just fall asleep on the mirtazapine. Trazodone doesn't sedate me, if you will, so I have to live with it now and that's really difficult.

Furthermore, I mentioned the PCOS because before diagnosis and treatment, I never had consistent periods for over 5 years. I probably had 10 at most in that time. When I was on mirtazapine, I slept through the hormonal turbulence. Now, I have to live with it and I don't know how to because not only am I not really accustomed to hormonal fluctuations, but they also aggravate my BPD symptoms something awful. My no self harm streak would be nearly a year or more. I am now lucky if it gets over 3 months, and part of my inspiration for this post is I really want it to get to 4 months and I am close.

So I am wondering what else can I do to help myself. Affirmations, books, hobbies, wellness techniques, advice from other forms of therapy, journal prompts, whatever you have, throw it my way for consideration because I really am tired and desperate. Particularly looking for advice from those who are in remission or are close to but have relapsed and pulled themselves out of it long term, and even moreso if you also have issues with the BPD clashing with your period hormones and/or PCOS.

Thanks for reading.

reddit.com

u/Frost_Blue_182 — 1 month ago

▲ 21 r/finch

I changed my goals and it helped me want to be recording things more again, although I think the way I am doing it now is either showing less reliance on the app.

I'll write a lot of it now. I have my goals for cat care and the odd tick thing here and there, but otherwise I just write down what I had done that day for cleaning, exercise, etc with a linked "thought dump" action. It's really helped because things can change a lot, even temporarily, and not being able to tick off some goals due to that were really discouraging despite the fact I had done enough or something else anyway.

I do also have some egg match goals with someone I will remove myself from once we get that egg. They've already gotten there and I am holding them back because I am just not on the app the same anymore. So Olive & Kristin, if you read this, please don't take it badly or personally when I do that because I just want you to pair with someone who will actually be on the app to tick off goals for you to get those micropets 💕

u/Frost_Blue_182 — 1 month ago