u/Fuckfaqir

I know its long. I am 26F and I’ve been sharing a flat with a man (around 30M) for about 2 months and with a girl (around 25) for about 5 months. I am living here almost 9months.
He told us he had recently broken up with his girlfriend because she was an alcoholic, and he didn’t want to live alone afterward, so he moved into a shared apartment. He works and takes day jobs whenever they’re available.
From the day he moved in, both my other flatmate and I felt something was a bit off socially. For example, if either of us leaves our room, he’ll often appear in the shared space within seconds and immediately start talking to us. He became physically comfortable with people very quickly (hugging another flatmate on her birthday after only knowing her for a couple of days), and he generally seems to have trouble reading personal space and social cues.
He also drinks constantly. This morning, at around 7:30 AM, while my other flatmate and I were having breakfast, he came out of his room, grabbed a 1-liter beer from the fridge, and went back. He almost always smells like alcohol, cigarettes, and sweat, and his breath usually smells strongly of alcohol. After he uses the bathroom, there’s often a strong stale alcohol smell left behind.
I’ve also caught him peeing with the bathroom door completely open when he thought nobody else was home.
Today I was using the bathroom when he tried to come in. I told him it was occupied.
A few seconds later, I heard what sounded like liquid hitting our metal kitchen sink. It wasn’t the sound of a running faucet at first—just liquid hitting the metal. A moment later I heard what sounded like someone washing their hands, and then he left the apartment.
Later I asked him about it because I genuinely suspected he’d used the kitchen sink instead of waiting. He denied it and said he was washing a plate. The thing is, in the two months he’s lived here, none of us have ever seen him cook, eat in the kitchen, or wash dishes. Instead of simply saying “No, I didn’t,” he became defensive and started listing things that the rest of us do that annoy him.
I know I never actually saw what happened, so I could absolutely be wrong. I’m not asking whether he’s guilty, because nobody here can know that.
**Would this be enough to make you question your flatmate’s hygiene, or do you think I’m connecting unrelated things because I already have concerns about his behavior? How would you handle this without falsely accusing someone?**

I know its long. I am 26F and I’ve been sharing a flat with a man (around 30M) for about 2 months and with a girl (around 25) for about 5 months. I am living here almost 9months.
He told us he had recently broken up with his girlfriend because she was an alcoholic, and he didn’t want to live alone afterward, so he moved into a shared apartment. He works and takes day jobs whenever they’re available.
From the day he moved in, both my other flatmate and I felt something was a bit off socially. For example, if either of us leaves our room, he’ll often appear in the shared space within seconds and immediately start talking to us. He became physically comfortable with people very quickly (hugging another flatmate on her birthday after only knowing her for a couple of days), and he generally seems to have trouble reading personal space and social cues.
He also drinks constantly. This morning, at around 7:30 AM, while my other flatmate and I were having breakfast, he came out of his room, grabbed a 1-liter beer from the fridge, and went back. He almost always smells like alcohol, cigarettes, and sweat, and his breath usually smells strongly of alcohol. After he uses the bathroom, there’s often a strong stale alcohol smell left behind.
I’ve also caught him peeing with the bathroom door completely open when he thought nobody else was home.
Today I was using the bathroom when he tried to come in. I told him it was occupied.
A few seconds later, I heard what sounded like liquid hitting our metal kitchen sink. It wasn’t the sound of a running faucet at first—just liquid hitting the metal. A moment later I heard what sounded like someone washing their hands, and then he left the apartment.
Later I asked him about it because I genuinely suspected he’d used the kitchen sink instead of waiting. He denied it and said he was washing a plate. The thing is, in the two months he’s lived here, none of us have ever seen him cook, eat in the kitchen, or wash dishes. Instead of simply saying “No, I didn’t,” he became defensive and started listing things that the rest of us do that annoy him.
I know I never actually saw what happened, so I could absolutely be wrong. I’m not asking whether he’s guilty, because nobody here can know that.
Would this be enough to make you question your flatmate’s hygiene, or do you think I’m connecting unrelated things because I already have concerns about his behavior? How would you handle this without falsely accusing someone?