u/Full-Requirement-574

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(I had my now boyfriend actually edit this cuz I'm kind of illiterate) (by the way this happened a long time ago I am now 21)Just for context I was a 18 year old female just graduated high school my date was 20 he is a freshman in college.

For context I have never been intimately in a relationship sexually with anyone and I'm unwilling to do that because of my moral standards no I am not religious but I am unwilling to have kids or have sex before marriage just wanted to put that out there.

I decided to get on tinder after I graduated high school and I met this really awesome guy on tinder and we had a few conversations with each other he seemed generally really nice l asked him for his phone number he gave me his phone number and I gave him mine we set up a date in a public place but it wasn't too fancy which I was okay with.

I was already all dressed up and I was wearing a basic crop top that showed nothing but was pretty tight on my chest and was wearing basic jeans that went all the way down to my ankles and some ankle Jordans. By the way he was wearing just a basic khaki pants and plaid shirt.

He picks me up to go to the restaurant and we hit it off right away during the car ride we were having some decent conversations about each other. I knew a little bit of much that his favorite color was red that he lived by himself and he is studying to be a doctor.

When we were getting served at the table I ordered a chicken parmesan and alfredo chicken on the side with potatoes and greens. he ordered steak and mashed potatoes with green beans.

We start talking about how I was not going to have kids until I was married we were talking about what we wanted to do in our lives.

We were laughing and having a blast and then out of nowhere he asked me "what was my body count"mind you this is our first date I did not answer him with a straight answer. So I asked him "what is your body count cuz I'm not comfortable with giving you my body count". Mind you my virginity is none of his business or how many people I've slept with. He looked at me stunned and hesitated to tell me that he slept with over 30 people. To be honest I was not expecting him to have this many but he was attractive enough to at least have some sort of sexual experience.

I asked him if he was honest with me he told me "yet I was just curious and I think you're a really nice girl and I would like to get to know you better". By the way by my moral standards that is not okay you should not be sleeping around like that but it's not my business to tell you what to do with your body but if you're going to be in an actual serious relationship you should not be sleeping around like that.

After that the atmosphere became awkward and tense and I wanted to leave so I paid for my half the check and I asked him to take me back to my home which by the way I understand that was very dangerous but he seemed like a genuinely nice dude. And this is what I told him because I felt very uncomfortable knowing that he has slept with about more then 5 people "I had a great time I think you're a really nice person it's just like you're not what I'm looking please don't contact me again" he said "ok" and drive away after he dropped me.

Some of his friends somehow got my social media accounts and was bombarding me with messages on how I should have given him a chance and that I was a piece of shit and delusional. And I was missing an opportunity to be with him. Mind you he was very friendly towards me and seemed like a nice guy but was not what I was looking for.

By the way I talked to my foster parents about this they said I did nothing wrong because they taught me never to settle for less and never be with the guy that has that high of a body count like that no matter if he's cute, sweet, kind or hot. Cuz you never know if he secretly has kids or he has some type of STD.

Me personally I don't find that attractive when somebody has that high of a body count but whatever girl chooses him is going to have a great life with him because he seems like a genuinely decent guy.

AITA-for not wanting to go on a second date or be with this guy because of his body count. Did I make the right choice?

(I had my now boyfriend actually edit this cuz I'm kind of illiterate) (by the way this happened a long time ago I am now 21)Just for context I was a 18 year old female just graduated high school my date was 20 he is a freshman in college.

For context I have never been intimately in a relationship sexually with anyone and I'm unwilling to do that because of my moral standards no I am not religious but I am unwilling to have kids or have sex before marriage just wanted to put that out there.

I decided to get on tinder after I graduated high school and I met this really awesome guy on tinder and we had a few conversations with each other he seemed generally really nice l asked him for his phone number he gave me his phone number and I gave him mine we set up a date in a public place but it wasn't too fancy which I was okay with.

I was already all dressed up and I was wearing a basic crop top that showed nothing but was pretty tight on my chest and was wearing basic jeans that went all the way down to my ankles and some ankle Jordans. By the way he was wearing just a basic khaki pants and plaid shirt.

He picks me up to go to the restaurant and we hit it off right away during the car ride we were having some decent conversations about each other. I knew a little bit of much that his favorite color was red that he lived by himself and he is studying to be a doctor.

When we were getting served at the table I ordered a chicken parmesan and alfredo chicken on the side with potatoes and greens. he ordered steak and mashed potatoes with green beans.

We start talking about how I was not going to have kids until I was married we were talking about what we wanted to do in our lives.

We were laughing and having a blast and then out of nowhere he asked me "what was my body count"mind you this is our first date I did not answer him with a straight answer. So I asked him "what is your body count cuz I'm not comfortable with giving you my body count". Mind you my virginity is none of his business or how many people I've slept with. He looked at me stunned and hesitated to tell me that he slept with over 30 people. To be honest I was not expecting him to have this many but he was attractive enough to at least have some sort of sexual experience.

I asked him if he was honest with me he told me "yet I was just curious and I think you're a really nice girl and I would like to get to know you better". By the way by my moral standards that is not okay you should not be sleeping around like that but it's not my business to tell you what to do with your body but if you're going to be in an actual serious relationship you should not be sleeping around like that.

After that the atmosphere became awkward and tense and I wanted to leave so I paid for my half the check and I asked him to take me back to my home which by the way I understand that was very dangerous but he seemed like a genuinely nice dude. And this is what I told him because I felt very uncomfortable knowing that he has slept with about more then 5 people "I had a great time I think you're a really nice person it's just like you're not what I'm looking please don't contact me again" he said "ok" and drive away after he dropped me.

Some of his friends somehow got my social media accounts and was bombarding me with messages on how I should have given him a chance and that I was a piece of shit and delusional. And I was missing an opportunity to be with him. Mind you he was very friendly towards me and seemed like a nice guy but was not what I was looking for.

By the way I talked to my foster parents about this they said I did nothing wrong because they taught me never to settle for less and never be with the guy that has that high of a body count like that no matter if he's cute, sweet, kind or hot. Cuz you never know if he secretly has kids or he has some type of STD.

Me personally I don't find that attractive when somebody has that high of a body count but whatever girl chooses him is going to have a great life with him because he seems like a genuinely decent guy.

AITA-for not wanting to go on a second date or be with this guy because of his body count.

I'm not going to go too much into detail but me and my biological parents are not very close they gave me up and my little brother up when he was three and I was five I grew up in my childhood without my biological parents and grew up with my grandmother who was a very toxic and narcissistic woman that is a story for the another time. Me now( 21) boyfriend ( 25 now) at the time I was 19 and he was 23

But anyway into the story I was about 18 years old I recently got kicked out of my grandma's house cuz I got into an argument with her and I ended up getting kicked out.

my biological parents took me in mom(35) and my dad (38) it started going out pretty well on the first day he asked me as an 18-year-old already legally an adult. If I was a virgin at the time I didn't understand what he meant by that so I said yes.

And things went down Hill from there he will tell me things about how he never wanted me to have kids.

He also told me a confession that he cheated on my mother while she was pregnant with me. And how I was not part of the family cuz I did not carry the last name because I was adopted by another family. When I recently at the time got my birth control because I had heavy bleeding and heavy periods. My father found out I did that and he said he was very upset and mad that I went on birth control to try and regulate my period. so I don't have any pain or cramping. "Why couldn't you have talked to me before you went on birth control" is what he said. I did not say anything at the time I did tell my mother she told me that "my father was just trying to protect me".I would admit I was in the wrong for this for not listening to him to not go out and start drinking.

I got really messed up I told the guy multiple times to no stop and thankfully he did let me go and did not do anything more than that I got home and tried to hide it because I know what my dad would say. Cuz the things he has told me in the past. Then he found out while I was high as heck on weed. I told him I got aside and he told me that it was my fault and that I was a whore. About a month later I got a boyfriend and I was hanging at his house. My dad came to his house uninvited in the middle of the night at 4:00 a.m. by the way at this moment in time I was 19.

He got really mad that we felt comfortable enough to sleep together even though me and this guy have known each other for about a year and started dating about a month in our relationship. then I moved out cuz me and my father got into another argument about my new boyfriend because apparently he did not want me to be with him and would make stuff up that he was abusing me and assaulting me even though he never did and at the time me and him were in a stage where we would fight a lot and I found that is actually normal when you start a relationship that will be phases in your relationship that. I feel like you guys should break up of course we did not break up because of this.

I was basically venting to my father about this trying to get his input basically what I was really mad about is that he was on his PC and playing on the game too much and not hanging out with me even though he works 12 hours each day. and this is what he said to me. He told me "that I should give him an ultimatum". I did that and it just caused more problems between us. This is what my boyfriend said about this"what my dad said was not all right or okay".And then a few weeks later my father invited me and my boyfriend over to his house to get to know my boyfriend better. Everything seemed fine and dandy until 4 months later my father called me and told me my boyfriend told him that "industrial maintenance is easy" I asked my boyfriend.

If he ever said that he told me calmly he never said that he said "maintenance deals with common sense he never said easy". My parents have tried to have a conversation with me and they would never listen to what I would say or listen to my thoughts instead they rather point out the things in my past and not let it go. Even though they're the ones that gave me up to adoption. And my father started saying pretty messed up things right off the bat when I first met him when I called out my father for this this is his response"that I'm insane and I need help and I'm clearly being abused and not asking for help"after that I blocked him and told him "do not contact me anymore until you understand what you did was not okay and you do need to apologize for the things you said that we're not okay".

A few months later after my mother's birthday I did wish her a happy birthday by the way. my mother wanted me to meet her up somewhere to talk about my behavior with my father and this is what I text back to her"we cannot meet up I will be working and there's nothing to talk about with my father he made his decision and he made his choice"I got blocked on everything after that we were supposed to be meeting up June 8th at Starbucks now I guess it's not going to happen.

I'm also being bombarded with messages of other family members on how I'm an ungrateful brat.

am I the AITA.

Just want to let you guys know I am kind of illiterate a little bit so if any of these text messages don't make any sense just comment and I'll give you a little bit of information but I tried my best. to try and type this out the best I can want to also clarify this I was already an adult when I first came to my biological parents

I'm not going to go too much into detail but me and my biological parents are not very close they gave me up and my little brother up when he was three and I was five I grew up in my childhood without my biological parents and grew up with my grandmother who was a very toxic and narcissistic woman that is a story for the another time. Me now( 21) boyfriend ( 25 now) at the time I was 19 and he was 23

But anyway into the story I was about 18 years old I recently got kicked out of my grandma's house cuz I got into an argument with her and I ended up getting kicked out.

my biological parents took me in mom(35) and my dad (38) it started going out pretty well on the first day he asked me as an 18-year-old already legally an adult. If I was a virgin at the time I didn't understand what he meant by that so I said yes.

And things went down Hill from there he will tell me things about how he never wanted me to have kids.

He also told me a confession that he cheated on my mother while she was pregnant with me. And how I was not part of the family cuz I did not carry the last name because I was adopted by another family. When I recently at the time got my birth control because I had heavy bleeding and heavy periods. My father found out I did that and he said he was very upset and mad that I went on birth control to try and regulate my period. so I don't have any pain or cramping. "Why couldn't you have talked to me before you went on birth control" is what he said. I did not say anything at the time I did tell my mother she told me that "my father was just trying to protect me".I would admit I was in the wrong for this for not listening to him to not go out and start drinking.

I got really messed up I told the guy multiple times to no stop and thankfully he did let me go and did not do anything more than that I got home and tried to hide it because I know what my dad would say. Cuz the things he has told me in the past. Then he found out while I was high as heck on weed. I told him I got aside and he told me that it was my fault and that I was a whore. About a month later I got a boyfriend and I was hanging at his house. My dad came to his house uninvited in the middle of the night at 4:00 a.m. by the way at this moment in time I was 19.

He got really mad that we felt comfortable enough to sleep together even though me and this guy have known each other for about a year and started dating about a month in our relationship. then I moved out cuz me and my father got into another argument about my new boyfriend because apparently he did not want me to be with him and would make stuff up that he was abusing me and assaulting me even though he never did and at the time me and him were in a stage where we would fight a lot and I found that is actually normal when you start a relationship that will be phases in your relationship that. I feel like you guys should break up of course we did not break up because of this.

I was basically venting to my father about this trying to get his input basically what I was really mad about is that he was on his PC and playing on the game too much and not hanging out with me even though he works 12 hours each day. and this is what he said to me. He told me "that I should give him an ultimatum". I did that and it just caused more problems between us. This is what my boyfriend said about this"what my dad said was not all right or okay".And then a few weeks later my father invited me and my boyfriend over to his house to get to know my boyfriend better. Everything seemed fine and dandy until 4 months later my father called me and told me my boyfriend told him that "industrial maintenance is easy" I asked my boyfriend.

If he ever said that he told me calmly he never said that he said "maintenance deals with common sense he never said easy". My parents have tried to have a conversation with me and they would never listen to what I would say or listen to my thoughts instead they rather point out the things in my past and not let it go. Even though they're the ones that gave me up to adoption. And my father started saying pretty messed up things right off the bat when I first met him when I called out my father for this this is his response"that I'm insane and I need help and I'm clearly being abused and not asking for help"after that I blocked him and told him "do not contact me anymore until you understand what you did was not okay and you do need to apologize for the things you said that we're not okay".

A few months later after my mother's birthday I did wish her a happy birthday by the way. my mother wanted me to meet her up somewhere to talk about my behavior with my father and this is what I text back to her"we cannot meet up I will be working and there's nothing to talk about with my father he made his decision and he made his choice"I got blocked on everything after that we were supposed to be meeting up June 8th at Starbucks now I guess it's not going to happen.

I'm also being bombarded with messages of other family members on how I'm an ungrateful brat.

am I the AMTJ