Can anyone recommend a brand of shorts that is flattering on the old mum tum and not too short in the leg?
I’m 12 weeks pp with no.3 and this one did DAMAGE, my dissatis recti (can’t spell it) & c sec overhang is beyond repair without surgery and I’m really struggling to find shorts and trousers that don’t emphasise it and are comfortable to wear sat down!
Desperately need to get some new bits to wear over half term in the sunshine ☀️!!
My partner is booked in for his vasectomy in June and we’re both content in the decision our family is complete we are 100% at capacity, but today I came across a video of Paris Fury dancing with Venezuela at her wedding and burst into tears. I don’t really know what came over me, I think it hit home that I’ll never have that and it stung.
I’m never going to have the privilege of watching a daughter of my own step into her womanhood or the chance to support her through motherhood if she chose to have a family, closest I can compare this feeling to is when I’ve applied for a job that I’m confident I’d be great at, I’ve got all the experience and accolades but didn’t make the cut. Which is ridiculous I know, as I’m so, so blessed with healthy children.
I never did experience gender disappointment with any of my boys, I love the bones of them all so these emotions have shocked me and I don’t quite know what to do with them.
Edit: Thanks everyone so much for their input it’s been so helpful reading through it all, I’m so grateful! Lots of things to take away, recognising oversights on my part, new perspectives, and tips to tackle these sort of conversations! ❤️
Like many of us I gained a lot of weight while pregnant and breastfeeding. I was in the process of loosing weight as I fell pregnant with our third. He’s 12 weeks now and again, I’m EBF so while trying to keep a balanced diet and exercise as/when I can. It’s so bloomin hard and I’d much rather preserve my milk supply now and weight loss later.
My eldest is in year 2 and the literature in school isn’t the most sensitive with lots of, fat this, fat that. Naturally, this has became part of his vocabulary.
He’s commented on me being fat a few times now. While I do need to loose around 4 stone to be back within a healthy weight category, I’m a size 16, I didn’t hate the way I look, but I’m starting to.
Initially I just agreed, neutrally. “Yes mummy is fat” and sort of waited to see what followed, mostly it was curiosity and I answered follow up questions honestly. Then it evolved to pointing at the telly where there was an advert for Jane plan with him suggesting I sign up (I was 34 weeks pregnant during this time).
Me and his dad have since had conversations about why we don’t comment on other people’s bodies, we can notice the variation in shapes and sizes we all come in, but we don’t mention it incase it upsets someone etc, and I let him know he had hurt my feelings.
He’s since started saying “you know what” instead - as code for fat.
Today we were having a nice moment and I told him how much I love him and that he’s my bestie, he replied “you’re not mine, because you’re … you know what”.
I was quite taken aback, while I knew he had made comments on my body and weight previously, I thought these were just describing words he was using, like tall and small, I wasn’t aware that he had negative connotations attached to fatness.
I didn’t know what to say, I was really hurt and still am so just said his name, gave him “the look” and changed the subject.
Obviously he’s not my best friend and I’m not his, he’s my son. It was just a light hearted remark as I wanted him to know how much I enjoy spending time with him. But it has got me wondering if he would potentially rule friendships out, purely down to their appearance? In which case I’d be heartbroken!
What would you do now? Is this normal?
I’m currently on mat leave with no.3
Before mat leave I worked 30hrs Friday-Monday, something we incorporated as my eldest (7) struggles to attend wrap around childcare for various reasons.
My partner has his own successful construction business which runs in the background and he also subcontracts to various contractors as a joiner. Some local jobs, some further afield, so he can be working away 2 out of every 4 weeks typically.
An opportunity to acquire 50% of another business has arose which he is considering the logistics of currently. It would be significantly more money, but with that, more work, the type that would mean evenings spent completing admin. I’m already familiar with this with his existing business, lots of quotes, paying invoices, firefighting when things go wrong. But the trade off is that he wouldn’t need to work away anymore, which I would just LOVE. It doesn’t feel like home when he’s not here.
I wouldn’t need to work in the typical sense anymore, which of course is an enormous privilege as working weekends felt like we were ships in the night. It would also afford me more time to get through the copious amount of house work we have. But I’m abit concerned about feeling mentally unstimulated and isolated. My financial contribution is only small compared to his, but it does wonders for my self esteem.
I’ve suggested taking on some of the responsibilities he has with his business as an employee, such as ordering supplies/skip/digger hire, managing deliveries, organising his diary, organising trades and paying invoices etc - this way I wouldn’t have an enormous gap in my CV should it not work out, but it all feels like quite a big leap.
Has anyone done something similar before and if so how did it work out, I’m only 29, I work hard and get good feedback, will I always wonder what opportunities might have came my way had I not became a SAHM?
My bare root apple seems to be doing some things…why do I feel emotional?!
I’ve hit the stage in parenting where I feel I just can’t have anything nice. Everything gets broken, stained, lost (due to being thrown around the place).
Every job I try to get done is interrupted by someone crying, the sound of balls bouncing around my house (put “no football inside” on my tomb stone), someone bleeding, fighting or coming to ‘help’.
This weekend I painted the skirting boards and by the time I’d finished the first coat I found a fresh chocolatey hand print on another wall.
Someone please tell me when my house will look semi okay again
My bestfriends partner has been planning their proposal for some time, I’ve helped him with a few details and suggestions for her ring etc so I’m quite in the loop.
He and I had a sneaky 5 mins to talk about it yesterday, I was being vague as my children were there, he doesn’t have kids himself & was a little tipsy and wasn’t so vague…to say the least, know my son knows the plan!
I had a serious talk with him (who was very excited about the news) about how this is a surprise, we can’t tell anyone and that it’s only me and daddy who know.
He and his dad went to help another one of our friends today, and my son told them about the upcoming proposal . Thankfully he already knew BUT NOW IM STRESSED!!!
I’ve had words with him again tonight to try and reinforce what could’ve happened if they didn’t already know etc, I feel so bad because it’s my fault for allowing that conversation to happen, but what the hell do I do now?!?!
The proposal won’t happen until June, we have plans next weekend and the following with the soon to be engaged couple (we’re the hosts) do I just cancel?! - childcare for one of the events isn’t an option as one is his brothers & dads shared bday bbq (only a small gathering of 6 adults & 4 kids so lots of potential for them to interact) HELP
So, I’m lactose & whey intolerant anyway but love dairy and don’t exclude it. Babes is 9 weeks today and I’ve noticed the following:
- very smelly poos & loud smelly wind. I’m EBF and his bowel movement smell distinctly different to my other two sons who were also breast fed.
- nappies were mucusy for a lot longer and still aren’t really seedy but still mustard in colour nonetheless - no blood/not green.
- No issues with weight, he does have a posterior tie but excellent tongue function.
- He does get rashy on the face neck and chest, but it goes down quickly so I’m not sure if the CMPA rash sticks around?
- He’s wheezy sometimes but with having two older brothers has already been gifted his first cold so not sure if it’s related.
- I don’t think it’s reflux or silent reflux (my first had it, no major arching of the back, is better at night time and no vomitting just the usual spit up, breath smells milky not sour
- lots of leg kicking, crying in addition to the painful smelly wind.
- Fussiness and symptoms have build up over time, what used to be a little wind and pain is now ALOT of wind and pain
Worth knowing he had his vaccinations 3 days ago and hasn’t been himself fully yet but I feel these gastro symptoms are definitely the worst! He is writhing around in pain today, could this be a side effect of the rotavirus oral solution?
HV and infant feeding team suggested giving it “a few more weeks” to see if we end up with blood in the stool and worsening symptoms but WHY would I do that?
Has anyone excluded for a period of time & reintroduced without a formal diagnosis? What would the harm be in just doing it now as a process of elimination?