u/FunImportant9513

Just landed a job after months of looking. I was drunk in the interview and when asked about gaps in my resume I said I was on maternity leave. It didn’t occur to me that my boss will definitely notice my lack of three offspring.

I guess I can pretend they died or I lost custody or something. I even showed this chick photos of my cousins as if they’re my kids. Fuck. Either way, I need a few more shots to celebrate (getting the job, not eliminating the children). Pour one out for me and my theoretical spawns

I feel like there’s nobody around to judge me anyway and I don’t have much accountability. Not that it’s not my fault, just explaining how it feels worsened. The only time I can talk to people even online is while drunk and high out of my mind. I feel free, able to talk more, and I’m almost the person I want to be. It can’t last forever, but it’s nice for fleeting moments

I was in finance but apparently companies don’t like when you spend all day “working from home” blasted off your fucking ass for weeks straight. Ended up accidentally sending client info to the whole ass wrong company and I guess that was the last straw and I’m too shitty at interviews to land anything besides long John silvers and even then I lost the job in two weeks. I see people on other subs saying fuck my chud life and idk what it means but fuck my chud life man