u/FurbyFucker3000

This is sorta a continuation after so many people told me to leave my relationship in a post from earlier tonight.

I need to feel like I'm good enough after abuse.

I've been in a relationship for 10 years and I'm wanting out... But I'm such a companion creature, I'm afraid I won't find something better. I feel I'm not going to be good enough for anyone that fits what I need.

I'm not attention seeking here, I just genuinely need to get a feel.

I'm disabled, had an extensively traumatic upbringing, I'm in poverty, unattractive. I have a child, and want another.

I'm wanting to leave my partner because he has been emotionally abusive towards me, and neglectful/absent to both our son and I. I'm also basically my partner's other mother. I got us set up in couple's therapy, but because he hurt me sexually, they terminated services. I tried to leave him soon after, but he threatened me in ways and demanded 50/50 custody. I need out. I loved him loyally, but fell out when he didn't love his family right. He became absent at the begining of the pregnancy, now saying he had depression and was afraid of losing his free time and money- so he doubled down on Xbox and buying collectables.

And i understand being alone is better than being abused, but I'm trying to build a way out. I've literally had major surgery this year so I can improve my health and prove I'm capable of caring for my son. I'm trying.

But just, I'm so afraid of being alone after I'm free. I don't feel like I'm enough for anyone.

Edit- I guess, like... My point of posting this is- is it wrong to leave him over this? I've talked to him about it, we were even briefly in couple's therapy. There are bigger problems, but this is the issue I'm sharing here. And why haven't I left? We have a child together and YES, my self esteem IS that bad.

Tldr- Partner expects regular oral sex despite not giving it in return for 10 years

I've been with my partner for 10 years...

When we first got together he was a virgin. He gave me oral, or attempted to, but threw up. He said it was gross and suffocating, but he'd work on tolerating it. That never happened, I just went 10 years without oral. He says pussy is just gross and he couldn't do it with anyone, period.

I'm rather sexually experienced, I miss oral. I've never had a man or woman grossed out by me before.

But through the relationship, I've given him oral regularly. The past year though, I've stopped. I'd get bitter giving him oral, struggling with frustration while pleasing him, and even finding him repulsive as of late. (For other reasons)

On a daily basis he pressures me over oral. Sending me memes about it, cracking pitiful jokes, passive comments, and just plainly complaining about it .

I'm not going to pressure him into giving me oral, honestly, I don't even have the confidence anymore. He's made me feel disgusting over the years.

I don't want to force myself into giving him oral. I've expressed how I feel, but his response is "well you know I CAN'T, don't pressure me. I feel sexually coerced. You're making me feel selfish. Do you want to leave me for a different man?"

He told me yesterday that my refusal to give him oral is eroding his self-confidence and he feels gross. That he misses the worship, connection and intimacy.

TLDR- Partner has become a bit deranged and sexually demanding, but only after he hurt me and I quit trying.

Sorry for bad typing, emotionally distressed.

My partner and I have been together for nearly 11 years, we had a child 3 years ago. Our entire relationship, I've sorta been the "boss". Yeah, he works- but I've made most decisions, done nearly everything outside of his job.

Since the pregnancy, things have fallen hard, rapidly. He said he emotionally bailed on me because he realized his days of binging video games and collecting figures were coming to a close... That he had severe depression because parenthood was harder than he expected. He didn't expect to "lose" so much time and money on a child.

I tried so hard to fix us, and got us into couple's therapy last summer... But when he hurt me (can't say how here) the therapist terminated services for my safety. After what happened I completely lost my libido and quit trying to hold intimacy, originally I was the only one putting in effort... He went from neglecting me to now making passive aggressive comments/insults about how I'm not providing what he needs.

Well... I'm to get major surgery next month, he's been less than supportive. He told me today he knows I'm going to leave him... That when I broke up with him in October, and took him back soon after- I only let him come home because I'm in too much pain to survive on my own. Once I'm in less pain and feeling better, I'm going to find someone attractive, someone that I'll actually love.

I'm already looking at having to go hours away for surgery by myself with just aide transportation. I drive and do all transportation. He doesn't have a license and his family refuses to help, they've been fighting a lot lately and they don't want me to get better, either. I have no family.

But since October, when he came back home... I've noticed that beyond the sexual demands, he's also been wearing my deodorant, using my body wash, wearing my perfume, demanding I share my clothes- though they're much too small. He's said PLENTY of unhinged things, like calling me Mommy and his momma bear, that he's my baby bear.

Just so much. I have a therapist and she's literally told me he terrifies her. I, unfortunately don't see her until the 27th as I'm so busy with pre-op appointments...

I don't know. I've tried to talk about it on other apps and it's always "call crisis!"

The crisis line is worthless.

I guess, like... What do? I don't even know...

Edit- Oh, yeah... He's also been trying to pressure me into having another baby. After being an absent father for our first.