u/Future-Accident6337

Today marks 12 years since I was assaulted. I was 16 and I wanted to wait till marriage. Meanwhile my parents were actively going through their divorce and the POS that did it had been my older brother's friend since I was in diapers. He took advantage of my mental state and it destroyed me for a long long time. Heck, I still think about it everyday.

Every year since, I've stayed home alone and spent the entire day crying and eating my weight in crap. Don't get me wrong, I have already started eating my way through my kitchen. It's currently 9am, I've been up since 1:30am, and I haven't cried yet. I'd like to thank my sister for helping me heal and the max dose of Lexapro that I take everyday lol

I can't say it gets easier, but after you learn coping mechanisms and start speaking about it, it becomes manageable.

My mom is a narcissist and was extremely neglectful/abusive towards my sister and I growing up. She kicked my sister out when she was 16 (I was at the time 8), then did everything in her power to keep my dad, brother, and I from having a relationship with her. I spent the next 8 years blaming my sister for how my mom is and what she was doing to me. Then when I was 21 I relocated myself back to my home state, thanks COVID for the perfect getaway, and got myself 11 hrs away from my mom. I finally sat down with my sister and talked. Of course, what she had to say was completely different than my moms stories. I made the decision 4 years to go full no contact with my mom and now my sister finally gets to be my best friend/sister/mom. (I actually want to give my sister a massive shout-out, she is the reason I am still here today. I've struggled with my mental health for as long as I can remember and with wanting to end it all. She has truly become the most supportive person in my life and has showed me what love is and what isn't love. It's been weirdly comforting finally having someone who, not only, truly understands my trauma, but also went through trauma with the same person. She is the best sister, mother, aunt, granddaughter, and friend. Her daughter is 14 now and is my sisters twin. It's kind of healing getting to see my niece get to grow up in such a healthy home, because I imagine my sister getting the childhood she deserved.)

Jump to today, she is now a published author. Her genre of choice, Christian love stories... That woman is not religious, she only went to church for weddings, funerals, and the occasional visit to get sympathy/attention. On top of that, the pain and trauma she caused my dad and us kids shows she doesn't know what love is. All of her books are about this small town perfect love, perfect family (think about the crappy Lifetime movies). I don't understand how someone who caused so much trauma to her own kids that it's forever altered their brains, could have so many people fooled? I get that's what narcissists do, but she still gets to live a good life after everything?