AuDHD partnership endgame? I think “living together alone” is the only way to care for the relationship
Image: two Tiny Homes connected by a covered patio 🏡 _🏡 Not my image, but possibly my dream living situation! Anyone else feel like this is an accommodation that would radically improve your quality of life?
Word choice: I originally wrote “AuDHD partnership endgame? I think “living together alone” is the only way to SAVE my relationship” but changed it to “CARE FOR the relationship” because caring is more honest than saving.
We are a neurodivergent couple in a long term commitment relationship and each of us need easy ways to CARE FOR each other. Easy, because the rest of life is so hard… not easy because we’re lazy about loving each other. We weren’t lazy when we did elder care, buried our parents, faced massive career changes, moved, opened wild new chapters and closed tragically sad old chapters.
I don’t want to end the relationship, but living together for 10 yrs has raised my cortisol levels and destroyed my mental health. We had a great time when we lived separately and I could control the cleanliness and order of my environment. Right now I have a corner of our home that’s just my domain, but it doesn’t include things like a bathroom and kitchen like a tiny house would. Yes, therapy has helped. But also therapy has reinforced/validated that having a safe and tidy cocoon is REALLY GOOD FOR MY BRAIN’S ABILITY TO AVOID BURN OUT!
Anyone else dream about a two-home solution?