u/General-Product-3662

I recently went to a buddy of mines little event at her house. She’s in construction and just finished her house and wanted to throw a party. She had always talked about wanting to create spaces for dykes in a way that we rarely see anymore. So many people came, mostly from union and trade jobs that she’s worked with but I made so many network connections, had great conversations. Everyone was just 100% authentic. Dykes who liked power tools and fishing and hiking and camping and knew how to grill, and how to fix cars and many of which brought their wives and their young children. It was the kind of thing I didn’t realize how much I needed and missed.

But I learned there’s a Big Gay Fishing trip every year where a bunch of lesbians charter a boat and hang out. There’s also Lezapolooza, a big lesbian camping weekend with fun events and skinny dipping . I felt like I was finally finding the hidden places that we have had to make for ourselves. And anyway, I figured I’d share so some of you guys looking for community can check one of them out and meet some really cool people. In a shitty world right now of terrible news, I finally felt some hope.

I have a wife (dx adhd and depression) and I feel like this past year it’s gotten so much worse. She’s in the middle of changing careers, she had severe burnout and mental breakdown from working in education after ten years, the lack of a job and needing space for her mental health makes her feel useless and even more depressed. We are working on different med changes, therapy, and trying to see if maybe a hormonal imbalance due to perio-menopause could help. But now I’m the financial leader. With that also comes being the one maintaining the house, most of the chores and bills. She’s easily overwhelmed and overstimulated , making it hard for her to do any executive functioning. I’m feeling tired and burnt out. I’m giving all the patience I can but working full time and then seeing the house a mess when I get home (multiple cups and dishes left about, laundry on the floor) it’s really draining me. How do you show up for yourselves when you need a break? How do you give yourselves space so that you don’t build resentment while your partner’s recover? It’s becoming harder and harder for me.