u/General-Swimming-157

Hi everyone,

I hope you're all excited to come to my birthday weekend and that you're on the way! Party supplies and some birthday presents arrived early, and even though she tried to hide them, I found them and took 2. I got a birthday Lambchop - my first Lambchop (photos 1 and 2) - and my first emotional support pickle (photos 3 and 4). I wasn't allowed to have squeaker toys because my mom thought I would choke on them. Once, my grandma got me a toy with squeakers, and she saw I removed the squeaker and spit it out and then went back for the next, and so on, she loosened up about squeaker toys. So now I have an emotional support pickle of my very own!

My mom took photo 5 after I fell asleep after de-squeaking Lambchop and the pickle. She said I had to include it for your amusement.

Hello friends,

I faced a grave misjustice this morning, and now I'm feeling very sad (photo 1). My mom got up from her nap on the couch and went to the bathroom. I followed her, as it is my duty to protect her while she is in there, just as she protects me when I go outside. A few seconds after she sat on the toilet, I heard greebles in the living room. I, of course, ran to my bed and chased them away. When she came back into the living room, she found me on my bed with the TV on. She said, "Who turned on the TV?" She looked more closely at my bed, and the rubber remote cover was chewed up, and the remote casing was in a few pieces (photo 2). I told her it was the greebles, whom I valiantly fought and chased away. She checked the remote and saw it still works, but she accused me of stealing and chewing the remote! She doesn't believe me that it was the greebles! She even denied me a belly rub because she said she's upset with me. This is the 4th remote that the greebles chewed in the past 2 months.

Can you all help me convince my mom that the greebles chewed all 4 remotes, not me? Mom says I am on a diet, so I can only get belly rubs and carrots as compensation. How many of each should I get, because I'm owed for protecting the house from greebles, saving the remote before it was damaged to the point it wouldn't work anymore, and as compensation for being falsely accused.

Thank you, Collins, (almost*) 7 yo yellow lab

*I'll put up another post soon, but everyone here and in r/legalcatadvice is invited to my party for my 7th birthday on May 18th!