Just ranting. We were living in a larger apartment on 28th Avenue and 46th until there was a fire in 2022. It was huge; 2br and even a separate large dining room for $2500. We moved to an apartment near Broadway and Steinway, which is half the size and $2800. we need more space however we can’t find what we need for under 3000. I actually love the building that we stay in but space is a major issue especially when we both have days where we work from home together.

StreetEasy is everyone’s go to and we were looking for apartments in Greenpoint. Nothing showed up under $3000 even for a studio.

I don’t foresee this changing anytime soon, so I suppose we’ll just lock in and adapt.

I am Black and husband is White and we live in Astoria. Since being in an open marriage, he has had more interest in me. We brought it up in couples counseling that I think it had more to do with race and he did not seem to understand.

We both use Grindr and I would not get as many connections. There are various reasons guys would be turned off to my profile; I’m married, can’t host being the most common.

Anyway, one night, during “prime time”, we decided to contact the same people and took real data. Out of the 20 guys we were both interested in, 17 responded to him and 3 to me and 2 to both of us. These guys were White, Asian, and Latino.

He was really upset and even proceeded to “confront” a few guys. But I did not want him to go on a Civil Rights trip. I told him it had to do with preference. In addition to the White, Asian, and Latino guys, he also gets plenty of attention from Black guys. Living in Astoria, the Black gay population is scant. I honestly have no issue with any race. But apparently not all people are like that.

My husband said that if I wanted to pause our open marriage; I politely decline. I see it as a way that if you don’t want me, then you don’t.

He’s made it his point to put in his profile, “Racist don’t respond”. “Love All.” Some hippie progressive crap.

I told him to take it down. I feel bad about doing this experiment because I sense he feels bad now. But, he still gets connections.

My point, would it be better for Grindr just to bring back the racial preferences featured. I mean you have to specify your race anyway. Maybe it would help those guys who just want “specific” dudes. And for those White, Asian, and Latino guys who say, well Black guys don’t want me. Well at least there are plenty of White, Asian, and Latino guys that do want you. And you wanting just Black guys is no different.

Ya feel me???

I have a strong interest in Astronomy and Cosmology but no one to share knowledge with. Is there anyone out there who has similar interests? I am sort of new at this but has amass a wealth of information and would like to discuss astronomy, astrophysics, or the JWST with anyone.

I live directly across from Noches De Margaritas on Steinway. Technically, I live on 38th Street, but my apartment faces the restaurant/bar, so I can clearly hear and see what is happening from my window.

Lately, the music has become absolutely unbearable. I genuinely thought this place was a restaurant, but at this point it feels like it has turned into a nightclub.

The bass and music are so loud that it carries directly into my apartment, even with the windows closed. It is especially miserable after 10 PM, when the noise really should not be at that level anymore. I understand businesses need to operate, and I am not trying to stop anyone from having a good time, but there has to be some basic respect for the people who actually live in the neighborhood.

It has gotten to the point where I dread the evenings because I know the music may start blasting again. After 10 PM, it becomes incredibly stressful and disruptive. It affects my ability to relax, sleep, and just have a peaceful night in my own home. Living near Steinway, I expect some noise, but this feels excessive and unfair to residents.

Has anyone else nearby been dealing with this? I have already considered filing complaints through 311, but I am wondering if there are other ways to report this or get it addressed. Is there a community board, SLA complaint process, precinct contact, or another city agency that handles repeated late-night noise from bars/restaurants?

I am not trying to be dramatic, but it is honestly making my apartment feel unlivable at night. Any advice from neighbors who have dealt with this would be really appreciated.

UPDATE!

I sent a message via Instagram and got an immediate response, but no immediate relief.

“Oh no! We're truly sorry to hear our music has been bothering you. That's definitely not what we want for our neighbors. We appreciate you letting us know, and we'll absolutely look into our sound levels right away, especially after 10 PM, to make sure everyone can enjoy their night peacefully. Thanks for reaching out!”

“Oh no! Thanks for letting us know again! We're truly on it, checking our sound levels to make sure our music doesn't carry too far for our amazing neighbors. We really appreciate your patience while we get this adjusted! We want everyone to have a great night!”

I want to keep this simple. I’m in an open marriage, I am threatened by someone my husband is in contact with (physical contact has occurred and will probably occur again), should I tell him to stop communicating with this person? I don’t care if he gets mad. Our marriage is priority. It’s something specifically about him, I witness their “interaction” and later it bothered me.

I never wanted to get married. But now, I am in a situation where my husband does not want me anymore. This was somewhat implied in couples counseling. In order to “save” my marriage, I came up with the brilliant idea of having an open marriage, mainly due to the fact that we have become sexually incompatible. Initially, he was against the idea, but, he’s met a couple of “friends” and I have not met anyone.

Without going into much details, I have barely been able to function. He claims he’s unhappy and I wonder why all of a sudden he does not know if he can deal with this cycle we have been going through.

Now, I can’t help but think if his decisions are being influenced by someone else.

But the messed up part to all of this is that I am so in love with him. Before I had no one. No friends or family. And over the years we have been married, I’ve acquired his. To lose all of that break my heart.

Most likely he’s going to ask for a divorce. Right now I am extremely depressed because I feel like my whole life that no one has truly loved me, my mother, former boyfriend, and now husband.

I don’t know what’s going to become of me. I’ll be financially secure. But I am afraid of what my life will be like when I am alone again.

Furthermore, the prospect of him being with someone else is sending me into a downward spiral.

Signed, A Stupid Husband…