u/Glittering_Grass_511

I remember when the content cop dropped, I was watching live. I had such a sinking feeling in my stomach as I clicked on it, especially seeing all those names in the description. It felt then and there to be an event that would have big ripple effects. I just felt so sad for Ethan and Hila to have a friend do something like that. I can't imagine a friend in my own life dropping a hit piece on me.

Watching yesterday's show and seeing E&H, the crew, and Harley and Kate all reflect on everything together made me strangely emotional. Kate's words on everything were so eloquent and well put, and having Harley join and give his input made me happy. Out of one of the worst betrayals, the family gained incredible new members that have made this whole community 10x better. Kudos to all of us soldiers who have stuck this out.

Peace love and abundance to the family <3 ~~~

edit: Also I can't remember the episode right now but when AB spoke his piece and said he would stick by E&H forever and Ethan choking up was one of the most beautiful moments of the last year <3 FAMILY

This morning I was scrolling and came across a video of a mom breastfeeding in the middle of the night, trying to delatch and the baby getting panicked and trying to relatch and grabbing anxiously at the mom - and it literally made me feel sick and sent a wave of terror through me. Like I just realized in that moment how much that is my nightmare - the lack of autonomy and being grabbed at like that. I can't explain it fully but it gave me another assurance that I don't feel motherhood is for me.

I opened the comments to see if anyone else was disturbed by it - only to find all the comments being from fellow moms talking about their own experiences, in quite calm/nurturing ways. Lol..! Just another confirmation. Any other women here get so turned off by the idea of breastfeeding?

Edit: since some people are asking - no I don't find breastfeeding itself to be gross or unnatural. It was the act of the child clawing/biting at the mom anxiously to relatch that made me very uncomfortable, in the way that another human would claw/bite at my body needily like that. Just the loss of autonomy/being treated like that freaks me out. I don't have any issue with other women going about their business breastfeeding even in public. Just meant that it gave *me* a wave of terror when thinking about it for myself!