Did I do something wrong contacting the police
I (31f) have been with my partner (33M) for 3 years and engaged for 1 but have been friends since we were teenagers.
We generally have a loving and supportive relationship but when he drinks he can on occasion turn emotionally and physically abusive.
A month ago I returned from a night out with friends to him drunk and sleeping on the sofa. I put my hand on his head to ask him to move along a bit so I could sit down but this made him kick off. Over the course of the next 30 minutes he hit me, threw a glass at my head and pushed me into the sofa screaming in my face whilst I repeatedly asked him to get off me. After this, I asked him to leave to stop it escalating further but he wouldn’t. I then decided I had to leave but in doing so it angered him so much that he chased me out the front door, grabbed me and then headbutted me. I immediately fled and phoned the police straight away whilst doing so who promptly showed up and arrested him.
At this point he was on bail for previously assaulting me 6 months ago. On that occasion during a drunken argument I tried to grab a bottle of my alcohol from him which resulted in him pushing me to the floor. When I stood back up he grabbed me again and so very very very regretfully I bit him and then he punched me in the nose to the point it was gushing blood and I thought it was broken. I did not phone the police straight away but phoned his mum to come over and calm him down. Whilst I was outside waiting for his mum to arrive he made a barrage of angry phone calls to me threatening that I would never be able to enter our property again, get my belongings or see our cats. At this point I called the non emergency number anonymously and explained the situation. I asked what my rights would be and what I could do on that night. I refused to give my name or address but unfortunately they traced the call and showed up. I told them I fell into a wall and refused to give a statement but he admitted punching me so was arrested and charged. There was a no contact order put in place but I didn’t want that and he moved back in consensually a week later in spite of the conditions.
He is angry at me for phoning the police on the most recent occasion fully knowing that he would be arrested for at least breach of bail. He says that he can’t forgive me, that he’s the victim and I’ve ruined his life. I was in genuine fear of my life at the time and didn’t know how else to ensure safety considering he’d already chased me out the door and headbutted me. I’m really doubting my choices and don’t know if I was wrong or should have tried to just run away outside for longer.
EDIT: to add to this - because of arguments in the past where I feel after the fact that reversal of blame happens I started audio recording any arguments so there is a clear record of what happened. I have an audio recording of the events of that night up to before the headbutt as I was leaving the property at that point. It’s proof of the entire event bar the final escalation.