Being a parent and having friends
I’m a SAHM and my husband works crazy long hours. Last week, we were invited to his friend’s house to hang out with their family (they have kids) and another family with kids after work which is like 5-6p. The kids are similar in age, but a year or two older than ours. The friend’s house is 45-50 min away from where we live. Our kids still take naps and have “early” bedtimes. Being the default parent, I prioritize the kids sleep and keep them on a schedule/routine. My husband wanted to stay at the friend’s house until 7p and I reluctantly agreed. When it came around to 7p, I started prepping my kids that we were leaving in a few minutes. My husband starts giving me the guilt trip saying they’re having fun. I told my husband if he wants to stay at the friend’s house, that’s fine, but I really need to start making the trek home and getting the kids bathed and doing all the nightly routine things. Both kids melted down when we got home and were clearly overtired. It was the right decision 100%.
After discussing later, my husband thinks we need to stretch the kids bedtime and he wants to stay out later, and “the other kids there were just fine.” It made me feel terrible for making the call that we needed to leave when we did. He wants us to have “couples friends,” which I understand, but I can’t do it at my kids expense. Anyone have thoughts or been in this situation? I know when they get older it’ll be more doable, and that’s what I tell him too. I told him this is what we signed up for…. He just doesn’t understand as much since he’s not the default parent.