u/Gloomy_Key2977

I don’t know how to start this. So I’ve had a really
bad childhood. Constants fight etc (because of my dad). Another thing is that since childhood i never felt safe with my dad. I don’t think any woman who knows him has ever felt safe with him. There were instances where he had “harassed” me (yes, the man who was supposed to be my protector). One of them being 13-14 year old me waking up at night and finding him just sitting on my bed looking at me. When i asked him why he was there he said he was looking for his shoes. Another instance is me sleeping and waking up to him holding my hand. There was another incident which i don’t feel comfortable sharing but it also occurred at night and i remember after it, i went to my brother and said i saw the shaytaan in my sleep (i said it infront of my dad). So one day i clearly told him if he ever dares to do something again i’ll call the police. He hasn’t done anything since.
So fast forward to now, almost 10 years later. I’ve always kept a distance. Sometimes i feel maybe he’s changed (and because of that we even talked normally sometimes) but i guess some people never change. I’ve always tried to not be disrespectful, until now. Im engaged and will get married next year InshAllah. The thing is my dad does not want me to marry outside of family and wants me to marry ones of my cousins. But i want to marry this guy. I don’t trust my dad AT ALL. I recently found out the he said lies about someone telling him that my fiance is not a good person. My brother asked that person if he had said that but the person said he doesn’t even know my fiance. So yeah. That made me angry and i angrily told him he should not speak in my matters and it is me and my elder sister (she has went through worse stuff than me) who have kept his honor and if we speak up about what he used to do no one will respect him. And i also said angrily that don’t think i’ll ever marry someone you chose, in fact i’ll run in the opposite direction. And that don’t call me “child” as i know you won’t ever choose anything good for me.

Am i wrong for saying this?

I don’t know how to start this. So I’ve had a really
bad childhood. Constants fight etc (because of my dad). Another thing is that since childhood i never felt safe with my dad. I don’t think any woman who knows him has ever felt safe with him. There were instances where he had “harassed” me (yes, the man who was supposed to be my protector). One of them being 13-14 year old me waking up at night and finding him just sitting on my bed looking at me. When i asked him why he was there he said he was looking for his shoes. Another instance is me sleeping and waking up to him holding my hand. There was another incident which i don’t feel comfortable sharing but it also occurred at night and i remember after it, i went to my brother and said i saw the shaytaan in my sleep (i said it infront of my dad). So one day i clearly told him if he ever dares to do something again i’ll call the police. He hasn’t done anything since.
So fast forward to now, almost 10 years later. I’ve always kept a distance. Sometimes i feel maybe he’s changed (and because of that we even talked normally sometimes) but i guess some people never change. I’ve always tried to not be disrespectful, until now. Im engaged and will get married next year InshAllah. The thing is my dad does not want me to marry outside of family and wants me to marry ones of my cousins. But i want to marry this guy. I don’t trust my dad AT ALL. I recently found out the he said lies about someone telling him that my fiance is not a good person. My brother asked that person if he had said that but the person said he doesn’t even know my fiance. So yeah. That made me angry and i angrily told him he should not speak in my matters and it is me and my elder sister (she has went through worse stuff than me) who have kept his honor and if we speak up about what he used to do no one will respect him. And i also said angrily that don’t think i’ll ever marry someone you chose, in fact i’ll run in the opposite direction. And that don’t call me “child” as i know you won’t ever choose anything good for me.

Am i wrong for saying this?

I don’t know how to start this. So I’ve had a really
bad childhood. Constants fight etc (because of my dad). Another thing is that since childhood i never felt safe with my dad. I don’t think any woman who knows him has ever felt safe with him. There were instances where he had “harassed” me (yes, the man who was supposed to be my protector). One of them being 13-14 year old me waking up at night and finding him just sitting on my bed looking at me. When i asked him why he was there he said he was looking for his shoes. Another instance is me sleeping and waking up to him holding my hand. There was another incident which i don’t feel comfortable sharing but it also occurred at night and i remember after it, i went to my brother and said i saw the shaytaan in my sleep (i said it infront of my dad). So one day i clearly told him if he ever dares to do something again i’ll call the police. He hasn’t done anything since.
So fast forward to now, almost 10 years later. I’ve always kept a distance. Sometimes i feel maybe he’s changed (and because of that we even talked normally sometimes) but i guess some people never change. I’ve always tried to not be disrespectful, until now. Im engaged and will get married next year InshAllah. The thing is my dad does not want me to marry outside of family and wants me to marry ones of my cousins. But i want to marry this guy. I don’t trust my dad AT ALL. I recently found out the he said lies about someone telling him that my fiance is not a good person. My brother asked that person if he had said that but the person said he doesn’t even know my fiance. So yeah. That made me angry and i angrily told him he should not speak in my matters and it is me and my elder sister (she has went through worse stuff than me) who have kept his honor and if we speak up about what he used to do no one will respect him. And i also said angrily that don’t think i’ll ever marry someone you chose, in fact i’ll run in the opposite direction. And that don’t call me “child” as i know you won’t ever choose anything good for me.

Am i wrong for saying this?