u/Grapefruit-6263

I live in Connecticut. My husband and I own a home together and it is our only property. We bought it before we were married and contributed (and contribute) to it equally. This is a second marriage and we each have kids from a prior marriage. We are in our 60s.

We recently met with an estate lawyer who suggested that we each put our "half" of our home in a life estate for the other, with each of our kids (or a trust which benefits our kids) as the "remaindermen." The lawyer said that this way, if one of us dies first, there is no worry about the remaining spouse disinheriting the children.

We have a decent amount of assets (mostly in retirement) outside of our home and our initial plan was to leave a portion of those assets to our children payable upon each of our deaths, and that would be their inheritance. Then, when the remaining spouse dies, all children would get an equal share of the home (if we still own it). For some reason, this idea of a life estate is really bothering me - because it seems like it overly complicates things and could make it difficult for the remaining spouse to sell or do anything without permission from the "life estate" trustee. I want things simple, and while I understand that there is no guarantee a widow/widower won't run off and remarry and then disinherit the kids, my view is that the kids will already have received plenty of money if one of us dies. (My spouse also has family money that will likely go directly to his kids so less to worry about on that side than on my side.) If we have a situation where we are 80, and our retirement funds are very depleted, and we don't have much extra to leave the kids, I might consider the life estate, but to have that restriction on someone makes me nervous.

I'm not sure why the lawyer is so hot on this - can someone else explain? We both have advanced degrees (though not in law) and have done our share of researching this, but would love to hear from any lawyers out there or someone who has been through this.

Sorry for the novel and thank you!

I live in CT. My husband and I own a home together and it is our only property. We bought it before we were married and contributed (and contribute) to it equally. This is a second marriage and we each have kids from a prior marriage. We are in our 60s.

We recently met with an estate lawyer who suggested that we each put our "half" of our home in a life estate for the other, with each of our kids (or a trust which benefits our kids) as the "remaindermen." The lawyer said that this way, if one of us dies first, there is no worry about the remaining spouse disinheriting the children.

We have a decent amount of assets (mostly in retirement) outside of our home and our initial plan was to leave a portion of those assets to our children payable upon each of our deaths, and that would be their inheritance. Then, when the remaining spouse dies, all children would get an equal share of the home (if we still own it). For some reason, this idea of a life estate is really bothering me - because it seems like it overly complicates things and could make it difficult for the remaining spouse to sell or do anything without permission from the "life estate" trustee. I want things simple, and while I understand that there is no guarantee a widow/widower won't run off and remarry and then disinherit the kids, my view is that the kids will already have received plenty of money if one of us dies. (My spouse also has family money that will likely go directly to his kids so less to worry about on that side than on my side.) If we have a situation where we are 80, and our retirement funds are very depleted, and we don't have much extra to leave the kids, I might consider the life estate, but to have that restriction on someone makes me nervous.

I'm not sure why the lawyer is so hot on this - can someone else explain? We both have advanced degrees (though not in law) and have done our share of researching this, but would love to hear from any lawyers out there or someone who has been through this.

Sorry for the novel and thank you!