The second you stop needing everyone else's approval, something shifts. You start making decisions based on what's actually best for you, not what keeps others comfortable. That's where real confidence comes from. Not from being told you're doing it right. From trusting yourself enough to figure it out.
You don't just wake up one day and feel confident. If you're just chasing this feeling without backing it up with any solid evidence, it will never stick.
What actually changes the way you feel about yourself are the decisions you make despite how you currently feel. Over time, that evidence changes the story you tell yourself.
So, stop trying to feel confident and give yourself real reasons to be.
Recently I have felt so overwhelmed with the uncertainty of my future. It's pressure that I haven't ever really felt and it hit me so abruptly it had me feeling so discouraged. I've never been so doubtful of myself before so it really made me confused why I was feeling this way.
I've been lifting for some time now and I thought to myself what it was that kept me going all these years in the gym even when I was feeling discouraged and doubtful of being able to achieve the results I was after.
I realized that it wasn't because I knew I was going to achieve the look I have now. It wasn't because of pure discipline, it wasn't because progress was always perfect. It was simply because I knew quitting wouldn't solve anything.
The more I would show up for myself, even when I didn't feel like it, developed proof. Proof that I could trust myself even when my mind was telling me to quit. Proof that discomfort wasn't a sign to stop, it was just part of the process.
There is no doubt in my mind that I would not be where I'm at now without the gym.
So when this uncertainty about my future hit me, I didn't have an answer for it right away. But I had something better. I had the same trust I built every single time I showed up to lift when I didn't want to. I realized the uncertainty didn't need to be solved today. It just needed me to keep showing up, the same way I always have.
If you're a guy reading this feeling lost right now, stop waiting until you feel ready or motivated. You don't need to have it figured out. You just need to go put in the work today. The clarity comes after, not before.
You got this 💪