u/Hairy-Argument7595

Tdy is my bdy nd I was planning to go out with my male best friend from college. He wanted to meet another friend in my hometown and asked if I knew the place and whether I could come along. I didn’t have any other plans, so I agreed.

I told my mom that I would be going out after college, but I said one of my female friends would be with me. I didn’t tell her that I would be the only girl because I knew she probably wouldn’t let me go.

I was planning to tell everything after I got back. I’ve never really hidden things like this,and she knows my phone password because I don’t usually have anything to hide.

This mrng, she told me that if there was someone from outside, I wouldn’t be allowed to go. Then I found out she had gone through my phone and read the whole convo with my friend.

This isn’t the first time she has checked my phone, and it’s really frustrating. I feel like I have no privacy at all.

The most frustrating part is that if I had told her the truth from the beginning, she would have been calling me constantly the entire time or might not have let me go at all.

I understand that she is worried abt my safety, but it feels like she doesn’t trust me at all.Bro Im 22 nd still have to ask permission to go out with my frnds, reallyy!??🤷‍♀️

He is my best friend, or maybe he was.

We loved each other before, but for some reason we couldn't get into a relationship. At that time, I thought I would be okay with it, but I couldn't take it. We had some fights, but now everything is solved. I told him that I'm over him and that I don't love him anymore, which is tru.

But I'm still attached to him.not love

This was my first experience of both having a best friend and loving someone, so it was hard. But I'm okay now.

I've always wanted to do it with him, yk. At least once. It's not something I could imagine doing with anyone else, only with him.

But I can't risk breaking this friendship because of this. I'm afraid that if I do, he will reject me and start distancing himself. I don't want to lose this friendship either.

A part of me feels guilty for thinking like this. I always thought that all those hollywood movies I watched made me believe this was something normal.

If he ever asked me, I'd say yes without a doubt.I really hope he do tht. And ofc I don't expect a love or relationship after this frm him.

Please tell me this is normal for this age(20's), and that I'm not a bad person for thinking like this.